And the Secret Ingredient Is
by vegamarie
Summary: What do you get when you mix two Super Saiyans with a competitive cooking show? It's a recipe for a whole lot of pandemonium. Allez cuisine! ON HIATUS INDEFINITELY.
1. Goku's Great Idea

**Well, this is a little silly idea for a story I came up with dealing mainly with Vegeta and Goku and…a cooking show! Takes place one year after the Kid Buu saga.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or Iron Chef America, so don't sue me!**

**Goku's Great Idea**

_It was a beautiful spring morning, normal in almost all respects. The sun was shining brightly, warming the earth below it. Male birds were singing loudly, creating a cacophony of noise used to attract members of the fairer sex. Bees were already buzzing loudly around the blooming tulips, daffodils, crocuses and cherry blossoms. All in all, the Earth was full of color and warmth, texture and sound and it was enough to make anyone happy to be alive on a day like today._

_Yes, for most casual observers, the day was perfect. But if you would happen to move into a certain city were a certain corporation is located, the day most certainly would not seem normal. If fact, it would seem as far from normal as possible. Instead of smelling flowers and hearing birdsong, you would probably smell the aroma of blood and sweat and hear the sounds of bodies ramming into each other at impossibly high speeds. And that is where our story begins…._

It looked to be a promising day as Bulma sat up tiredly in bed, letting out a huge yawn as she hurriedly turned the alarm off that had awoken her from her slumber. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes, she groaned and moved her body away from the now cold indent that had previously held the sleeping form of her mate. She didn't want to get up but she knew if she didn't, she'd be drug out of bed either by her hungry husband or her equally hungry son. Her whole body ached. Vegeta had been in one of his moods last night and she didn't think she could have gotten more than four hours of sleep. _He_ had to have had even less seeing as his side of the bed was already cold. Shaking her head in irritation at how overly dedicated he was to training and getting up before any normal person would make their way out of a nice, warm bed, Bulma stood up and grabbed her bathrobe, making her way downstairs to find out what her family was up to this early in the morning

Meanwhile, Vegeta was outside taking advantage of the weather. It was finally starting to get warm and he was sick of being cooped up inside all of the time because Bulma was afraid he would catch pneumonia or something stupid like that. He grunted to himself thinking that she worried way too much where it concerned him, but part of him secretly liked being coddled, although he would never admit to _that_ in a million years. Normally, he spent his mornings training in the gravity room but the promising day had prompted him to forgo his normal routine. It also had the added benefit of inducing his slugabed son to train with him without his usual excessive amount of complaining, all of which irritated Vegeta to no end. He was seriously beginning to think that his son was going to turn into a weakling pussy and that was completely unacceptable for a Royal Saiyan Prince, even if he _was_ half human and lived on a weak and pathetic planet.

Growling, he lunged at his son who was currently watching a bird fly past which had caught his attention. Hitting his son square in the chest with a flying kick, Trunks went careening through the air, almost hitting the building behind him before he caught a hold of himself. Wincing in pain, he glared at his father with eyes that reminded Vegeta of Bulma when she was excessively pissed off.

"Gee Dad, what'd you do that for? That hurt!" He said petulantly. Vegeta visibly grimaced at his son's tone of voice, once again showing him how his mate's behavior was influencing how their son was growing up.

Vegeta crossed his arms, levitating close to where his son was currently pouting. "Good! Now maybe you'll learn to keep your guard up against potential enemies. It's unwise to take your eyes off of a battle when it's in progress, something you should already know!" Vegeta growled angrily, showing no sign that he felt bad in any way for hitting his only son. Though realistically, he did feel a smidgen of guilt knowing that the boy was probably going to have a bruise. He also shuddered at the thought of Bulma screeching at him for injuring her "poor baby." He did not want to have to deal with Bulma's cranky attitude first thing in the morning.

"Yeah, but Dad, we aren't fighting for real! Come on, go easy on me. Goten's dad doesn't kick him in the chest!" Trunks liked hanging out at the Son's household and Goku was way more fun to fight with than his stodgy old sourpuss father was.

"With that kind of attitude, it's no wonder that you and your little friend got devoured by Buu." Vegeta shouted loudly at his annoying child. He was sick of always being compared to that baka, especially when it came out of his own child's mouth. "I don't want to hear another word about Kakarot and his stupid brat. You are training with me and when I'm through with you, you'll know what it's like to be a real warrior. Now shut your mouth, stop acting like a spoiled baby and get ready!" By now, Vegeta was thoroughly irritated with his child. It hadn't been that long ago that Trunks had practically worshipped the ground he walked on and wanted to spend quality time training. But lately, he had become more interested in playing video games and hanging out with Vegeta's former rival and his obnoxious family. He didn't want to think that perhaps his irritation was from the current lack of attention his son was giving him and that it damaged his feelings. On top of that, he was bored. Training his son, no matter how childishly he behaved, was exhilarating. And it helped make up for the fact that Vegeta's own father had had very little to do with him. For some reason, he didn't want Trunks to grow up the same way.

Growling at himself for being to sentimental, Vegeta powered up and attacked Trunks again. This time, Trunks was ready for him. 'Finally,' Vegeta thought as he kicked out at Trunks, 'the brat is paying attention.' Losing himself into the moment of the fight, Vegeta got so caught up, he didn't notice when his son suddenly turned away and started waving at someone. Before he could stop himself, Vegeta kneed him in the back and sent him flying again towards Capsule Corp. But this time, Trunks didn't put the brakes on. Vegeta watched in horror as his purple haired brat went crashing into the second floor, creating a gaping hole next to where his and Bulma's room was located. Hearing the crash, Vegeta visibly winced both when he saw the damage _and_ when he saw a certain blue haired female come running outside.

"Oh my god! Trunks!" Bulma shrieked at the top of her lungs. She was about to run back into the house to get to her baby when she saw the little boy stand up shakily from where he was laying.

"I'm okay Mom!" Trunks yelled as he jumped through the hole and landed on the ground. Before he could move away, a very hysterical Bulma ran over and enveloped him in a huge bear hug, making sure to kiss every inch of his precious little face. Vegeta wanted to gag at the public display of affection and he could tell by the way his son was squirming around, he felt the same way.

"Ewww Mom, let me go! I'm fine!" Trunks yelled, wheeling his arms and shaking his body to get away from his psycho mother.

Landing behind Bulma, but making sure to keep at least five feet of space between them, Vegeta spoke up.

"Woman, if he can stand and fly, there hasn't been any serious damage done, so lay off of him! You're going to turn him into a sentimental pile of mush!" Vegeta knew as soon as the words were out of his mouth that it was probably the wrong thing to say to his mate.

Standing up and turning around, Bulma marched over to her husband. Putting her finger in the middle of his chest, she moved in for the attack. Vegeta swallowed visibly when he saw the look in her eyes. 'Why do I have to put myself in these situations? It's too early to listen to her rant and scream." He groaned inwardly, knowing that Bulma was about to boil over.

"I can't believe you Vegeta! You just kicked him into a wall! He's got cuts on his head and blood all over himself. I can't send him to school like that again! It was bad enough the last time you beat him up. I don't want social services coming over here because my dickhead husband won't conform to earth society were it's considered barbaric and abusive to cause bodily injury to harmless children!" Bulma screamed into his face.

Sweating, Vegeta backed up a bit. "Look, Bulma, Trunks isn't harmless! He can transform into a Super Saiyan for Dende's sake! He's fine. A few cuts and bruises, that's all. You can tell the school he fell out of a tree or something." Vegeta grimaced when he saw Bulma's expression change from insane and irrational rage to calculated anger.

"Oh, no you don't mister! I am not calling the school to tell them why our son, yet again, is covered in bruises! I'm tired of everyone thinking I'm a terrible mother. You can do it yourself, since you're the one who caused this whole thing to happen!"

"Forget it! I'm not calling the school. It's not in my job description!" Vegeta yelled back at Bulma. There was absolutely no way in hell he would ever lower himself to that level.

"Fine. If I have to call the school, you can sleep outside for the rest of the year!" Bulma challenged Vegeta.

"_What? _You can't be serious. You're just bluffing." Vegeta stated nervously, pulling on the collar of his training jersey. He watched as Bulma took on a smirk very reminiscent of his own. Vegeta knew that look and it meant he was in big trouble.

Bulma looked on at Vegeta in triumph. She knew she had won this round, even if she had to play dirty. There just was no way that she was going to have to explain why Trunks looked as though he had been run over by a truck to the school officials for the millionth time that year. She knew they didn't believe the excuses she came up with and it was only a matter of time before her family would be in serious trouble. On top of that, the publicity for Capsule Corp. would be horrendous. Crossing her arms and tapping her foot, she waited for the inevitable outcome.

Vegeta looked sheepishly at his bitchy mate. Telling himself that it was only because he didn't want to deal with her, he muttered out his response.

Bulma had heard Vegeta loud and clear but she couldn't help rubbing in the fact that she had won an argument against the temperamental Saiyan. Cupping her ear, she leaned forward towards where Vegeta was standing. "I couldn't hear you. Could you repeat that Vegeta?"

"I said I'll do it. But don't expect this to happen again, Woman! This is a one time occurrence!" Vegeta growled out testily. Living on this stupid planet must have completely eroded his sense of warrior pride for him to back down like that. Ugh, it was completely disgusting! Growling under his breath while looking at his smug mate, Vegeta turned around to where Trunks had been only to see that the boy wasn't alone.

"Kakarot, you imbecile! How long have you been hanging around?" Vegeta yelled, the veins bulging out on his forehead. It was one thing for him to cave into Bulma when they were alone. It didn't damage his pride as much. But to have his former enemy possibly hear that whole damned conversation was too much for him to handle.

"Not too long Vegeta! I came right when you nailed Trunks with your knee." Turning to Bulma, who was also glaring at him, Goku raised his hands in apology. "Hey Bulma, it's my fault Trunks made a hole in your house. I shouldn't have waved at him when I landed." Then Goku turned in the direction of where Trunks was standing, twiddling his thumbs waiting for his dumb parents to stop yelling at each other in public. They were so totally embarrassing sometimes! Looking at Trunks somewhat sternly, he decided to give the boy a small pointer. "I shouldn't have waved at you, but Trunks, you have to pay attention to the person you're fighting with otherwise you could end up dead meat. Got that?" Goku asked. Trunks shook his head in the affirmative. Why did everyone have to be on his case? It just wasn't fair!

"Look Kakarot, I don't need you to tell my son what he's doing wrong. He already knows, since he already felt my wrath this morning when he was daydreaming instead of watching my movements. Isn't that right, Trunks?" Vegeta said with a stern expression plastered across his visage.

"Yes Father." Trunks replied moodily. Then suddenly his appearance of sulleness changed into one of hope. Looking at his parents with sad puppy dog eyes, Trunks tried to look as pathetic as possible before he continued on with the conversation. "Hey, cause I'm hurt and all, can I stay home from school?" he asked eagerly. School sucked big time and on top of that, he hadn't finished his science project because he had stayed up playing video games in his room all night. The project just so happened to be due today. His mother was going to have a screamfest when she found out. But if he was sick, he could finish it today and still get credit. 'Sometimes I amaze myself with my intellect,' Trunks thought pompously to himself.

Unfortunately for Trunks, both of his parents seemed to have the opposite idea.

"No!" They both shouted in unison.

"Aww, come on! Dad didn't go to school when he was my age, so why do I have to go?"

"I didn't go to school because I was working a full time job! Even if I think Earthling schools are stupid, you need to have something put in that brain of yours if you ever want to consider being a Saiyan Prince. Besides that, your mother thinks it's a good idea." Even though secretly, Vegeta couldn't stand sending Trunks to school. The teachers were imbeciles and they were all terrified of him. So terrified in fact that they never reprimanded his son for misbehavior, which only made Trunks that much more unbearable to live with at home. But he wasn't going to argue with Bulma about it because chances were, if Trunks were pulled out of school, that would mean Vegeta would be the one teaching him. Not a pleasant idea at all in his opinion.

"Well, I'm glad we're in agreement, Vegeta." Bulma said. She then looked at her son and motioned him to follow her. "Come on little prince, you've got to get cleaned up for school. You look horrible and you probably smell worse than a rotting corpse since you seem to have inherited your father's propensity for bad BO!" She then turned around and looked at Vegeta sternly. "And you had better call the school Vegeta, or you know what will happen. And, just to make sure you do it, you can't eat until I have proof." With that, she turned around and marched smartly back into the house, Trunks trailing behind her with a look of misery on his face.

Vegeta stared at the receding form of his mate. He was fuming. How dare she threaten not to feed him or kick him out of his bed? Who did she think she was? He was about to run after her and pull her back out to tell her exactly what he thought of her attitude when he remembered that Kakarot was still standing on his property. Turning around, he glared at Goku, hoping he would get the hint and get the hell away from Capsule Corp. However, just like usual, Goku didn't seem to understand the look Vegeta was giving him.

"Hey Vegeta, are you okay? Man oh man, I thought Chi-Chi was bad. But Bulma? She terrifies me!" Goku said as he scratched his head.

"And your point is?" Vegeta asked snidely. "Look Kakarot, I don't have time to waste, so why don't you tell me why the hell you're here this morning and then you can leave!"

"Gee, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed!" Goku said teasingly to the tense Saiyan Prince. It was the completely wrong thing to say. Before he knew it, Vegeta attacked him, punching his squarely in the face, causing him to fall over and hold his nose as it bled all down his orange fighting gi and onto the grass.

"Man Vegeta, why'd you do that?" Goku said as he tried to staunch the flow of blood coming from his nose.

"Because I felt like it. Now if you don't mind, I'd like to get back to my training. So hurry up and explain why your nefarious ass is sitting on my property and then scram before I put a permanent hole through your ugly head!" Just to make his point, Vegeta raised the palm of his hand so it was level with Goku's head and started to concentrate his ki energy around his outstretched arm.

Seeing that Vegeta wasn't in the mood to be kidding around, Goku swallowed nervously and then gagged when he tasted the bitter flavor of his blood sliding down his throat.

"Well, I'm waiting Kakarot!" Vegeta spoke impatiently. The sooner he got rid of Kakarot, the sooner he could make that damn phone call to Trunks's school and the sooner he could eat whatever meal Bulma and her mother put together for breakfast.

"Ofay alfready." Goku mumbled, having difficulty talking with his nose currently plugged to stop the blood flow. "I fame ofer to fee if youf wanted to spar. Am becaufe I hafe this really great idea!"

"Well, I suppose I could spar with you. But a great idea coming from you? What a joke!" Vegeta shot back at Goku, whose nose had finally stopped bleeding, although it looked like it was swelling up in size. Vegeta held back a laugh when he saw how ugly his nose looked almost assured by its appearance that he had broken it.

"No seriously Vegeta, you'll love it!"

"I think love is too strong of word wherever you're concerned, moron." Seeing that Goku looked like he was about to piss his pants in excitement, Vegeta crossed his arms and let out a sigh, waiting for the idiot to continue on with his train of thought.

"Okay, so here's my great idea. I think it'll be loads of fun." Vegeta grimaced at the sound of the dreaded "f" word. He was a Saiyan and Saiyans were not supposed to have fun unless it was related to fighting, and he had a feeling that whatever Goku's idea entailed, there was no fighting involved. "There's this really great television show on my favorite TV station. And they are going to be holding trials for regular people to be able to compete in the show! Isn't that great, Vegeta?" Goku said happily.

"So what? I could care less about your favorite TV show, baka. Besides which, reality TV is the lamest thing since the Ginyu Force."

"No way Vegeta. It's not a reality show. You'll think it's great, you'll see!"

"Well, how can I think it's great if you won't even explain what it's about? You're wasting my time." Clenching his teeth in exasperation, Vegeta started to walk back towards the house so he could call Trunks's school and get it over with. But Goku wasn't through with him yet. He ran in front of Vegeta's retreating figure and bodily blocked him from entering the house.

"Out of my way Kakarot, unless you really want to experience pain!" Vegeta growled at the idiot standing before him.

"No, just wait Vegeta. I wasn't done explaining!"

"Well, then hurry up! Honestly, a snail could give out information faster than you and they can't talk!"

Seeing the scary grimace across Vegeta's face, Goku decided he'd better hurry up before his ass was barbecued.

"Alright. Well basically, the show's a cooking contest between two chefs: a chef from a well known restaurant and a master chef from the show. Each chef gets an hour to make a four-course meal and a dessert. The only catch is that they have to use a secret ingredient, which they have no prior knowledge of, in each of their dishes. When the time is up, a panel of food experts judges their food. You usually hope that the visiting chef beats the other one. It's really exciting to watch!"

"And you want me to audition to try out for a cooking show? You've got to be out of your mind Kakarot! Cooking is for women and sissies. Besides, I know for a fact that you can't cook a lick and I can't either, so what's the point? I will not make a fool of myself on television!" Vegeta growled as he tried to push his way past Goku.

"Come on Vegeta! So what if we can't cook? We can learn. And I know how competitive you are. I think once you watch the show, you'll know what I mean! It isn't like other boring shows. It's fast paced and crazy! So please? Just watch an episode with me. It should be on in a couple of minutes."

Vegeta narrowed his eyes at Goku's last comment. "Are you telling me you came all this way at this time in the morning so I could watch a cooking show with you? Now I really know you're bananas!" He maneuvered around Goku and continued on his way, only to be stopped yet again when Goku put his arms and legs in front of the door, making it impossible for Vegeta to enter that way.

"Please Vegeta? It won't be a waste of your time, I promise!" Goku pleaded. He had his heart set on trying out and he thought the Vegeta would be a great partner. They were both really competitive and it would be fun to work together again with him.

"Promise all you want, but I refuse. I've done plenty of silly and ridiculous things with you and each time I do, it makes me want to vomit. The answer is no!"

"Well, just watch the show with me. If you still think it's a dumb idea, then I'll leave you alone! What do you have to lose?" Goku asked desperately.

Vegeta weighed in his options. If he refused, he would have to deal with a sappy rejected looking Kakarot that would pout and whine the whole time they sparred together. If he did watch the show, it would give him an extra hour to think about what he was going to say to Trunk's teacher about his son's current condition, plus he wouldn't have to deal with Goku being a cry baby because he had fulfilled part of his original requirements. Sighing, he realized just how soft living on Earth was making him. He was considering watching the blasted television to satisfy Kakarot, for Dende's sake! Finally making his decision, he looked at Goku.

"Fine, I'll watch the blasted show with you. But that's it! If I think it's retarded you can forget about getting me to go and compete to get on the dumb thing."

"Great!" Goku said excitedly. "You'll love it, I promise you!"

"Well, what are we waiting for? Move your fat ass out of my door so we can get this over with!" With that, the two Saiyans entered Capsule Corp. and made their way to the waiting television to watch a rousing re-run episode of _Iron Chef America._

About an hour later… 

Vegeta leaned back on the couch he was sitting on, putting his hands behind his head. He looked over at Goku, who was leaning towards the TV in excitement. Even though he didn't want to admit it, Goku had been right about the show. At first, Vegeta had thought it was extremely lame. There was too much drama in the beginning for him to take it seriously. But then it had changed. The two chefs competed fiercely against each other, each taking into account their strengths and weaknesses while they prepared their food. And the whole thing about using a secret ingredient in each dish was ingenious! He hadn't realized how difficult it could be to cook a meal centered on one thing. But they somehow managed to do it in an hour. It was nothing short of amazing! Vegeta, being the highly competitive person that he was, could feel his resolve weakening. It would be great to show up the pathetic humans on the show with his Super Saiyan cooking abilities. But unfortunately, the comment he had made to Kakarot earlier about neither one of them being able to cook was true. Deciding to ask a question without seeming interested in Kakarot's proposition, Vegeta looked over at him with a bored expression on his face.

"So Kakarot, when are these stupid auditions for this _Iron Chef_ show anyway?"

"They're in a month Vegeta! Are you interested?" Goku asked, seeing the twinkle of speculation in Vegeta's eye.

"Perhaps. It all depends on what you're willing to do for me." Vegeta said, suddenly concocting a plan that would get him off the hook about calling the school while making it seem like his whole choice was dependent on Kakarot's response to his idea.

Goku looked back Vegeta apprehensively. Although Vegeta had mellowed out considerably since he had first come to Earth, he was by no means averse to using less then humane methods to get what he wanted. "What do you have in mind?"

"For starters, you can call up Trunks's school and explain to them why he's all bruised up."

"I can't do that Vegeta! Bulma said you had to!"

"So? What she doesn't know won't kill her. Besides, the school won't even know it's not me, since I never make contact with them anyway. As for the rest, I'll think up something good. So, if you really want to do this, and I still think it's flipping lame by the way, you have to call Trunks's school. Otherwise, I refuse."

Goku sat and thought about it. He didn't think it was right to impersonate Vegeta and he didn't want to be on Bulma's bad side if she found out. But he really, _really_ wanted to compete on _Iron Chef America_ with Vegeta as his partner. Making a decision, he turned towards his smirking counterpart and extended his hand.

"Fine Vegeta, you have a deal!"

Taking Kakarot's hand in his own, Vegeta shook on the deal and sighed with relief that he wouldn't have to call the school. He snapped out of his reverie when he heard a startled gasp form the vicinity of the door.

"Vegeta! What on earth are you and Goku doing in here?" Bulma asked. They were sitting on the couch together holding hands! Something was up between the two of them, and she did not want to know what they were doing.

Seeing Bulma, Vegeta hurriedly let go of Goku's hand, realizing what it must look like to his mate. Blushing, he looked over at where Bulma was standing before he opened his mouth.

"We weren't doing anything, Woman!"

"Whatever. I don't want to know. Anyway, have you called the school yet? You're breakfast is getting cold. If you don't hurry up, Trunks will eat it and then you'll just have to go hungry until lunch time!"

"Fine Woman! I'm on my way to call his stupid school now!" Vegeta yelled at Bulma. He was completely humiliated about being caught holding hands with Kakarot. It was almost unbearable.

Bulma took his tone of voice as a personal attack and reacted in kind. "Jeez, you don't have to be such a crabby patty Vegeta!" She said huffily. With that, she walked out of the room in a huff muttering about how stupid men were most of the time.

"Stupid Woman!" Turning to Kakarot, he motioned for him to get his butt moving. "Hurry up! You have to call the school now or you can forget about this stupid cooking show."

Goku stood up and saluted Vegeta. "Aye Aye, Captain! Just show me where the phone is, and I'll make your phone call."

Vegeta rolled his eyes and motioned at the other end of the room near the window with his head. "It's right over their, idiot! The numbers already programmed in, so all you have to do his hit number one after you pick up the receiver. Do you think you can handle that?" Vegeta asked, beginning to wonder if having Goku impersonate him was such a great idea.

"Sure thing Vegeta." Goku walked over to the phone and followed the instructions.

When the school answered the phone, Goku began to speak in a low gravely voice trying to sound as close to Vegeta as possible. What it really sounded like was nothing at all like Vegeta's voice. It made him want to wince at how terrible Goku was at impersonations.

"Yes, this is Vegeta…" Goku had to think if Vegeta went by a last name before he remembered Bulma's surname. Vegeta slapped the front of his forehead in exasperation. Honestly, the guy was as stupid as they come and that wasn't saying much! "Vegeta Briefs speaking. I'm the father of Trunks Briefs. Yes…Yes. Uh huh. Well, um…I'm calling in regards of my son. Uh, he was playing this morning and he had a small accident. No, no, nothing serious. What was he doing?" At that, Goku looked over to Vegeta for help, not knowing what to say.

"Kakarot," Vegeta hissed. "Make something up, idiot!" Seeing that the younger Saiyan was panicking, Vegeta blurted out the first thing that came out of his mouth. "Tell them he fell off of his bicycle and do it quick before they start to think something is up!"

Taking the hint, Goku replied back into the phone. "He fell off of his bike. Yes, he'll be fine. He just has some bruises and cuts, but we took care of that here." Goku paused on the phone, waiting for the school secretary to finish talking before he continued. "Yes, well that's about it. He'll be in school today. All right. Thanks for your help. Goodbye." With that, Goku hung up the phone and wiped some of the sweat that was coming down his face. That had been intimidating. Now he knew why Vegeta hadn't wanted to talk to the school. It was almost as bad as being stuck with a needle, and Goku hated needles with a passion.

"Well, that was too close Kakarot! And what kind of voice were you using? You did not sound like me in the slightest!" Vegeta said in a testy tone of voice.

"That was the best I could do Vegeta. But they bought the story about the bike, so you're off the hook."

"Alright. Well, since you did that little job for me, I suppose I'll help you out with that stupid show. But we're going to do things my way, got that?"

"Sure thing Vegeta! This'll be great, just you wait and see!"

Vegeta hoped so because otherwise, his life was going to suck royally for the next month.

_Well, it's done. Sorry if it's a little long. Do you like this idea? Tell me what you think if you read it. Please R&R_


	2. And the Training Begins

**Hey, thanks for the reviews for those of you kind enough to provide me with some! They really help make writing a lot easier because I know people are reading my work! Here is the next chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or Iron Chef America and I'm not getting paid to write about the characters from either show. This is purely written for the sole purpose of fun.**

_And the Training Begins_

Vegeta lay in his bed looking at the ceiling above him, listening to the soft snores coming from the woman who was lying next to him. It was early in the morning, earlier than even Vegeta normally got up, but he was too preoccupied to sleep. He'd been thinking about the competition he'd agreed to enlist with Kakarot in and his blood was already humming with anticipation for the upcoming event. He felt a little bit foolish that he was on a mission to learn how to cook and he had to keep it a secret from Bulma and Trunks at all costs. If they knew what he was going to be doing with Kakarot for the next month, starting today, he'd never be able to live it down. However, the prospect of finding another new challenge, one in which he had to use other skills besides his fighting power, was exciting to the Saiyan Prince, even if he did have to team up again with an idiot third class.

Sitting up in bed, he accidentally nudged Bulma with his knee, causing her to abruptly wake up. He watched her as she groggily moved her head to look at the alarm clock sitting next to her side of the bed.

"Awwww, Veegeetta…" Bulma mumbled as she rubbed her eyes tiredly. "It's three o' clock in the morning. That's early even for you." Yawning, she reclined back in the pillows, closing her eyes, trying to fall back asleep. But it was difficult because she could feel the nervous energy Vegeta was radiating at the moment. She wanted to slap him when he accidentally nudged her again. Snapping her eyes open, she glared at him before she opened her mouth. "Look Vegeta, I know this is a hard concept for you to understand, but try to bear with me. It's early. It's still dark out. Normal people are sleeping. So why don't you lie your head back down on your pillow and close your eyes and go to sleep so I…can…get…_SOME_…**_REST_**! Uuugh!" Bulma yelled at him, throwing one of the pillows she was using at his oversized head.

Vegeta just crossed his arms across his chest and glared back at her. "Quiet Woman! If you don't shut your mouth, you're going to wake up the brat, and if you think I'm bad this early in the morning, wait until you have to deal with him!" Vegeta knew what he was talking about since waking Trunks up early in the morning for training fell to him. And the kid made Bulma look like an angel in the morning.

"Whatever Vegeta. I just want to get some rest before I have to get up and help Mom slave over in the kitchen fixing your royal self and your obnoxious son a breakfast that would be able to feed all the starving children in Africa!" She said angrily. Then, just as suddenly, her expression softened as she moved in closer to where Vegeta was sitting. Leaning her head against his arms, she gave him a look that would melt any man's heart, even one as cold hearted as himself. "And I just want to snuggle with you before you get up in an hour and a half to train. Is that too much to ask for?"

Vegeta rolled his eyes, feeling his resolve weakening. "I don't snuggle Bulma." He replied gruffly.

Bulma just looked at him with a small smile on her face. He could deny it all he wanted, but she knew the truth. Her husband had a soft side, even if he never showed it to anyone but her. "You do too, Vegeta. Just lie back and relax. Maybe then you'll be able to figure out a solution to whatever is bothering you." With that she pushed him back down into their bed and curled up at his side as he put his arm around her, bringing her in close to his warm and handsome body.

Lying there with Bulma wrapped up in his arms, Vegeta felt himself relax as he took another look at finding a solution to hide what he was doing from her. Suddenly, it hit him! He almost wanted to sit up again and shout "Of course!" but he wasn't stupid enough to wake up the temperamental woman who was currently lying next to him and drooling all over his chest. Smirking to himself, he closed his eyes and drifted back off to sleep, dreaming about kicking some sissy human's ass with his impressive culinary skills.

_Later that morning…_

Bulma looked at her lavender haired son in exasperation. He had been poking around at eating his breakfast for the last twenty minutes, something he only did if he was trying to weasel his way out of something. And to top it off, she and her mother had had to keep the rest of the super-sized portions of breakfast food warm because Vegeta still hadn't come back in the house from training. She was actually starting to get a little worried. It was totally unlike Vegeta to miss a meal. It was the one constant that kept the crazy Briefs family on the same wavelength. Putting her hands on her hips, she put her worries about Vegeta firmly in the back of her head as she rounded on her son who was in the process of aiming scrambled eggs at the cat that was sitting on her father's shoulder.

"Trunks Vegeta Briefs! If I catch you trying to throw eggs at Kitty one more time, I'm going to call Vegeta in here and make sure he takes you out to the Gravity Room for two hours of extra training time after school!" Trunks swallowed nervously and put his loaded fork back on top of his half-empty plate. Practicing for two extra hours after school with his dad was probably the worst punishment he could endure because it would mean time spent away from his precious video games.

Watching her son as he put down his fork, Bulma let out a sigh of relief. She then decided it was high time he stopped picking at his food and started to eat it.

"Trunks, I'm going to have your Grandpa put the microwave timer on for five minutes if you don't start eating what's on your plate. And believe me, if I have to do that, you aren't going to like it mister!"

"Aww, come on Mom! Putting the timer on is for babies. Besides, I don't feel too good this morning. My head hurts from yesterday. I think Dad did a real number on me when he kicked me into the house!" With that, he let out an exaggerated groan and put his hand to his forehead like the ladies he had seen on TV. Bulma just rolled her eyes. She knew what was up.

"Trunks, put a sock in it. I know you're faking it. You were perfectly fine when Goten came over to spar with you yesterday afternoon. I think it has something to do with your missing science assignment and I have a hunch that you didn't finish it, even though you told me you did. I'm not as dumb as you think I am, kid!" She was going to have to start checking his homework because Trunks was doing poorly in school even though he was probably one of the brightest kids at school, inheriting her super intelligence. Looking at Trunks, she knew she was right on the mark when he turned red and then tried to change the subject.

"I don't want to go to school. All the kids are going to tease me. It was bad enough yesterday when Mrs. Vector asked me if I was okay after I fell of my bicycle in front of the whole class. I mean, I'm nine years old! I haven't fallen off of bike since I was a baby. Dad came up with the lamest excuse and now everyone thinks I'm a wimp!" He complained.

"Well honey, I'm sorry to break it to you, but sometimes you have to do stuff you don't like. Which means you are going to school whether or not the kids are teasing you. Now, I suggest you get back at that breakfast, oh son of mine, if you don't want to find out what other punishments I have up my sleeve!" She watched him, making sure he started to eat his food. She was about to sit down when she saw her father fold up the newspaper he was reading and stand up.

Looking at his grandson, Dr. Briefs spoke up. "Well Trunks, it looks like you better do what Bulma says. She's a hard cookie to try and break." Walking around the table to where the boy was gloomily eating his eggs, Dr. Briefs leaned over and whispered conspiratorially into his grandson's ear. "Just between you and me, come down to the science lab after school and I'll help you make something that'll knock your teacher's socks off." With that he patted the boy on the head, who was know smiling eagerly as he shoveled the eggs into his mouth with renewed vigor. Turning to Bulma, he winked at her. "I'll see you down in the lab later, dear." Bulma waved at him has he left the kitchen to go back to the lab with his black cat in tow. She finally let out a sigh of relief as she sat down, only to be interrupted by the door opening. 'Finally, Vegeta's decided to come in and get his breakfast!" But she was disappointed when it turned out to be Goku.

"Hey Goku!" Trunks yelled through his over stuffed mouth, spewing half chewed up eggs and bacon all over the table. Seeing the look his mother was giving him, he quickly swallowed his mouthful and apologized.

Glaring at him, Bulma decided she'd had enough! "Trunks, that is it. Forget the timer! You are through! Go upstairs, brush your teeth and get cleaned up for school. And because you have no manners whatsoever this morning and you didn't finish your food, you are grounded from video games for the rest of the week!"

"But Mom!" Trunks whined. It was so unfair. He had said he was sorry, for Dende's sake!

"No buts. Just do it. And be down here in twenty minutes, because if you are late for school, you really don't want to know what will happen to you." Seeing the look on his mother's face, Trunks hopped off of the chair he was sitting and made a beeline for his room.

Goku just stared at Bulma. He had never interrupted breakfast before at the Briefs household, but Bulma sure was scary first thing in the morning. At least she didn't have a gigantic frying pan, but her mouth was harsh enough to flay anyone alive. He swallowed nervously when her eyes fastened themselves onto him. Gods, he hoped she hadn't discovered it was him who had called Trunks's school yesterday. He almost let out a sigh of relief when she gave him a warm smile and motioned for him to sit down, as she got up to clean the mess that Trunks had left all over the table.

"Hey Goku, what are you doing over here this early in the morning? This is the second time in two days. Usually you don't come around except for maybe once a month or so." Bulma asked, curious as to why he had stopped by two days in a row.

"Uh, nothing really." He said nervously. Man oh man, he had promised Vegeta that he wouldn't spill the beans to Bulma or her family about their little cooking contest, but he had a really hard time lying to anyone. Pulling at his gi, he asked Bulma if Vegeta was around.

"No. He got up early this morning and I haven't seen him." Her gaze suddenly turned dark as she looked at the large oven, which was currently holding part of Vegeta's breakfast. "I've paged over to the Gravity Room to let him know his breakfast is ready, but he hasn't answered and he still hasn't come in to eat, which is unlike him. I'm wondering if didn't leave West City to train out in the countryside somewhere. It would be just like that jerk to make a change of plans without telling me."

Goku was about to make a reply when the man in question breezed into the kitchen. But instead of greeting his mate with his usual smirk, he walked over to where Goku was sitting.

"Kakarot, you're here. What took you so long? I've been waiting for you for half an hour." Vegeta grunted out testily.

Looking at Vegeta sheepishly, Goku was about to reply when a very angry Bulma stepped around the table and stood in front of her husband.

"You've been waiting for him for a half an hour? I can't believe you! I've had your stupid breakfast warming in the oven all this time and you've been hanging around in the Gravity Room!" Bulma shouted into his face.

"Look, arguing about breakfast is pointless. I've got serious training to do and I don't want to be interrupted." Vegeta yelled back at his irate mate.

"Oh no you don't Vegeta! I've been up all morning slaving over the stove so you could have your nice hot breakfast at your usual time. I haven't had time to get ready to take Trunks to school because I've been waiting for you to show your ugly face this morning. You are going to sit down right over there and eat your breakfast, even if I have to shove it down your throat!"

"Woman, if me eating my breakfast is that important, have the workbots take it out to the Gravity Room. But now that Kakarot is here, I don't have time to sit in here and eat it." Honestly, she was so cranky sometimes it was enough to give him a headache.

Seeing that it would be impossible to reason with Vegeta about this, Bulma decided to cave in. "Fine." She said huffily. "I'll get the workbots to take your stupid breakfast out to the GR. But next time you don't show up on time, I'm throwing it all away and you can go hungry." With that, Bulma marched out of the kitchen in a huff.

Seeing that Goku was going to make a stupid smart aleck remark about his and Bulma's stormy relationship, Vegeta interrupted him before he got the chance.

"If you know what's good for you, you won't say anything." He was satisfied when he saw the younger Saiyan snap his mouth shut with an audible click.

"Come on Baka, It's already past the time I said we were going to start training. So let's get a move on before this day gets any worse." Vegeta motioned Goku to follow him as they headed back outside.

"Sure thing Vegeta. But why are we going back to the Gravity Room? I thought we were going to be training for the cooking competition, not having a friendly spar." Goku asked confused.

"We aren't going back to the Gravity Room. At least, not yet we aren't." With that, Vegeta walked across the lawn to where the construction workers were currently fixing the hole in the wall that Trunks had made yesterday morning.

Following Vegeta, Goku was puzzled. He thought they were going to be learning how to cook. But unless there was a secret kitchen in this vicinity, Vegeta's actions just weren't making any sense.

"Uh, Vegeta? What exactly are we doing?" Goku asked. This whole situation was getting weirder and weirder by the moment. He was seriously beginning to wonder if Vegeta was mentally unbalanced when he noticed the smaller Saiyan was levitating up to the second floor, completely ignoring the gasps of the startled construction workers.

"Hurry up idiot." Vegeta said as he motioned for Goku to follow. It suddenly hit Goku that they were going into Vegeta's room, but it still didn't make any sense.

Landing on the balcony outside, Goku waited as Vegeta put his ear to the door, listening for something.

"Good, she's in the shower!" Opening the door quietly, Vegeta snuck across the carpeted expanse of the room he shared with Bulma making his way to the closet. Goku had been in Vegeta's room once before a long time ago, before Vegeta had mated with Bulma and that had been weird. But he really felt uncomfortable stepping into the domain that both Vegeta and Bulma shared, especially since Bulma was currently in the shower and he could hear her singing off key.

Stepping in nervously, he waited as he heard Vegeta grumbling while he looked through the closet for something.

"Stupid Woman! Why can't she keep her dumb clothes on her side of the closet! What a slob. Gods, what repulsive piece of underwear is this? Gross! And she had to throw it on top of my armor. We're going to have a little chat about this!" By the time Vegeta came back out of the closet with whatever it was he had to get, Goku's face had turned completely red. He'd just learned more information about the private life of Bulma and Vegeta than he ever wanted to know. But he was in for even more of a surprise as Vegeta threw him what it was he had been looking for. Before he got a chance to react, he watched in shock as the Saiyan Prince opened the bathroom door and bodily walked inside. He heard Bulma shriek as the cold air hit her naked body, but at least he didn't have to see. Closing his eyes, he heard their conversation loud and clear.

"Vegeta, what do you think you're doing in here! Get out!"

"No way Bulma! When you get done, you had better go and straighten up your side of the closet. I never want to find this on my armor again, do you understand?"

"Fine Vegeta. I don't see what you're so upset about. You're the one who wanted me to wear it! Ugh. Now get out!"

"Fine!" With that, Vegeta stepped out of the bathroom and slammed the door behind him. Looking at the very embarrassed Goku, Vegeta just glared at him. "What are you staring at, moron?"

"N-nothing Vegeta." Goku said.

"Then get moving. We've already wasted enough time as it is. Let's go!"

Relieved that they were finally leaving Vegeta's room, Goku followed him outside back to the Gravity Room.

"Do you have what I threw you?" Vegeta asked as he punched in his code to get into the GR.

"Yeah. What is it though? It looks like some sort of movie or something." Goku asked. He was still really puzzled at whatever training regiment Vegeta had planned for them to get ready for the competition in a month.

"You'll just have to wait and see." With that, the two Saiyans made their way into Vegeta's special training domain. He was satisfied to see that the workbots had brought in his breakfast while he had been digging through the closet for his secret training tool. Turning around he grabbed the box that Goku was holding and made his way to the main consul that held the controls for the Gravity Room. Opening the box, he put something into the consul that looked suspiciously like a DVD. Grabbing the remote, Vegeta took a capsule out of his pocket and released it. Out popped two pads of paper and two pens. Throwing one of each to Goku, he motioned the Saiyan to sit down on the floor in front of the large screen that Bulma had installed a long time ago so she could nag at him while he was training.

Sitting down Indian style, Vegeta settled himself in. Grabbing some of the breakfast the workbots had left for him, he started to eat when he noticed that Goku was sitting and looking at him with a very confused look on his face.

"Uh, Vegeta, I don't mean to question you or anything, but _what_ exactly are we doing?"

"We are going to watch our competition and take notes on their strengths and weaknesses."

"We are? But don't we need to learn how to cook first?" Maybe having agreed to let Vegeta be in charge of their training hadn't been such a great idea.

"Ugh, why do I have to explain myself to you? Listen up Kakarot. In order to win any offensive, you have to know what you are up against. We could be the best cooks in the world, but if we don't have any idea what the competition is going to be like, how can we formulate a plan for their demise? So this is my brilliant training strategy. I went out and bought the first season of _Iron Chef America_. You and I are going to sit in here and watch every episode, making sure to take accurate notes about what they are good at and what they aren't. Afterwards, we will tabulate our results so we can get a good idea about what we need to work on. And then we will learn how to cook. The basic idea is to know your enemy. Understood?"

Goku stared at Vegeta in awe. He had known for a long time that Vegeta could be a brilliant tactician, but he had underestimated his ability. Even though this idea seemed weird at first, it really did make a lot of sense, and for the first time since he'd hatched this idea, he thought they might actually have a chance of making it onto the show. Of course, that all depended on whether or not they could actually learn how to cook.

"Wow Vegeta, that's great. But how come we're watching them here in the Gravity Room? You guys have an awesome home entertainment system. At least that's what Goten says every time he spends the night over with Trunks."

Rolling his eyes at his ignorant counterpart, Vegeta finished chewing up a sausage and swallowed it before answering Goku.

"Look Kakarot, do I really need to explain? Well, I suppose since it's you I'm dealing with, I have to. I already told you I don't want Bulma and Trunks to know what we are doing. Do you honestly think they wouldn't think something was up if you and I were sitting in the home theatre watching a cooking show together for hours at a time? Use what brains the Great Saiyan Gods gave you and think a little!" Vegeta suddenly feared that if he spent all his time with Goku, his own intelligence was going to leak out of his brain. The man could be a brilliant fighter, but sometimes he really lacked in the common sense department.

"Oh yeah! I get you. If we're in here for hours at a time, Bulma will just think that we're sparring together. That does make sense. But how are we going to hide the fact that we're trying to learn how to cook? We're going to have to use somebody's kitchen."

"Look, I haven't thought that out yet, but I'll let you in on it when I figure it out. Now stop asking stupid questions so we can get on with watching this program." With that, Vegeta turned on the movie and they began the process of dissecting the talents of the four iron chefs: Masaharu Morimoto, Bobby Flay, Cat Cora and Mario Batali.

Time flew by as both Saiyans took calculated notes (well, at least Vegeta took calculated notes) about their possible opponents. Vegeta and Goku didn't realize that half the day had gone by when a beep came across the intercom cueing Vegeta in that they were going to have a visitor very soon. Standing up, he vaporized the dishes left over from his breakfast, turned off the episode they were watching and hissed at Goku to stand up.

"Hurry up! We're going to have company! Look like you're fighting me!"

Just as Goku tried to get Vegeta into a headlock, the GR door opened admitting Bulma.

"Oh my God, you guys are still at it? It's almost two in the afternoon!" Bulma said as she looked around at the GR. Something wasn't right with this whole situation. For one thing, neither Goku nor Vegeta looked like they had worked up a sweat with one another. For another thing, there was no tell-tail bodily damage to either one, which was the usual result when the two of them sparred together. And they hardly ever sparred together without coming inside to get something to eat, but this was the second time today that Vegeta had missed coming in the house to get a meal.

Standing in front of the two guilty looking warriors, Bulma lost her patience.

"Alright! I've had enough. What is up with you two? You guys are acting way too suspicious!"

"Nothing is going on Woman. We're just trying to pound each other's heads in." Vegeta stated. He had to be quick with his wits if he didn't want Bulma to figure out his little secret.

"I don't believe you. You are up to something Vegeta and I'm going to find out what it is! Anyway, I've came in to deliver a message for Goku." Turning towards the other Saiyan who had a very sheepish expression on his face, she could see the guilt radiating off of his body. "Chi-Chi called. You're supposed to escort Goten home from school since he has to stay after for detention. Apparently, he got into a scuffle with a kid who called him a weirdo because of his hairstyle. She also said she wants you to pick up some kimchi from the local market for supper. Got that Goku, or do you need me to write it down for you?"

Goku scratched his head. With all the information swimming around in his head, he hoped he got the gist of what Chi-Chi had wanted him to do. Otherwise, he was going to have a very sore head.

"Uh, I got it Bulma. Thanks." Turning around, he looked at Vegeta. "Well, thanks for training with me. I gotta go or else my butts going to be in sling." Walking towards the entrance, he waved at Vegeta, who just grunted sourly at him.

"Bye Vegeta! Bye Bulma! See you tomorrow!" With that, he left, leaving a very curious Bulma with her nervous husband.

"So, he's coming back tomorrow is he? You know Vegeta, we've been together for a lot of years and I know we've grown easy in each other's company, to a certain extent. But sometimes I think you forget about that little bond we have between each other and the fact that even though you're really good at hiding your true feelings, I can pick up cues." Leaning in towards her husband, she noticed a pad of paper that had been kicked across the Gravity Room. She saw right away that Vegeta noticed her looking at it and was trying to pretend he wasn't interested in the slightest. His whole behavior since yesterday was weird and today took the cake. She was positive he was hiding something, and she suddenly felt uneasy about why he and Goku were suddenly spending so much time together.

"Well, you can pick up cues. Good for you. But just for the record, nothing is going on so don't get your knickers in a twist!" Vegeta said haughtily. She was beginning to make him nervous with her deductive reasoning. If she found out, he didn't want to even begin to think about the consequences.

Heading for the doorway, Bulma turned around. "Oh, I know something is up. And when I find out what it is Vegeta, you're going to be very sorry. But let's just forget about this for the time being. Since you didn't come in for lunch, I thought about throwing it in the garbage like I threatened to do. But seeing as I am such a kind-hearted wife, I saved it for you. So come in the house when you finish straightening up in here." With that, Bulma left.

Vegeta stared nervously after his retreating mate. That had been a close one. If she had picked up the notebook he'd kicked out of the way, he would have been toast. The thought of having Bulma laugh at him for doing such a stupid and un-Vegeta like thing was very discomforting for the Prince, who liked to have all things under control. Wiping the sweat off of his brow, he picked up the pads of paper he and Goku had used to take notes, storing them in a drawer. Putting everything back into place, Vegeta made his way outside to go get his lunch and face his curious mate.

_So the secret plan is underway and already Vegeta and Goku are under fire from a very suspicious Bulma. How are they going to continue with their training without getting caught? Find out in the next chapter!_


	3. The First Attempt at the Art of Cooking

**Here's the next chapter. Hope you enjoy it! And many thanks to the people who have reviewed so far.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own DBZ or Iron Chef**

_**The First Attempt at the Art of Cooking**_

It was the day after Bulma had made her concerns about Vegeta and Goku's strange behavior known and Vegeta felt like he was walking on egg shells. Last night had been almost unbearable, with Bulma trying to squeeze out whatever information she could get her hands on in any way possible. He hadn't realized how tenacious his mate could be when she got a bee in her bonnet, but he should have realized that even though she did not have a strong power level, she more then made up for it with her intelligence and her sheer will power. Trying to hide anything from Bulma had become more and more difficult the longer the two of them had been together. She knew him better than anyone else, having an insight into Vegeta's true character that no one else possessed. And in some ways, her ability to understand Vegeta stemmed from the fact that the two of them shared quite a few personality traits. They were both stubborn, prideful, argumentative and extremely intelligent. So in short, being able to outwit Bulma was like trying to outwit himself. And that was a very difficult thing to do.

Determining the best course of action was to keep his day to day routine as ordinary as possible, Vegeta decided not to wait in the Gravity Room for Goku to show up. Besides, the moron was always late anyway and if he didn't want Bulma sniffing at his trail, it was in his best interest to keep it cool. And with the way his day was already progressing, the less he had to deal with an overly inquisitive Bulma, the better.

The morning had started out bad for Vegeta. He had woken up at his usual time to train and had went to grab his son, who spent the entirety of their training complaining about how early it was and how normal fathers did not make their sons get up at the crack of dawn so they could administer a beating. Fed up with his son's attitude, Vegeta had yelled at him and told him to get lost, that it wasn't worth his time to train with a whiny baby. Of course, he regretted those words as soon as they left his mouth. For one thing, Trunks looked totally rejected, and for another, he knew that Bulma would interpret Trunks's hurt look as being caused by his callous father's overbearing attitude. Since he was already under scrutiny from his insatiable mate, he didn't want to add fuel to the fire, which was exactly what was going to happen when she saw Trunks. Muttering to himself about how his family was all crazy and demented, Vegeta had followed his son into the house. Fortunately for Vegeta, Trunks had gone immediately to his room without stopping in the kitchen where Mrs. Briefs and Bulma were currently making a huge Saiyan sized breakfast, which is where Vegeta decided to cool off.

Turning around from where she was standing, Bulma smiled at Vegeta, who always looked cute when he came in from his morning training. His hairline was always damp with sweat, and she could see his muscular and toned physique through the damp, skintight training gear he favored. And she just _loved_ his muscles! Deciding she had been a little pre-mature in her thinking that something was up between Vegeta and Goku yesterday, Bulma felt bad about interrogating Vegeta all last night and she wanted to make it up to him. So she had gotten up super early to help her Mom make extra portions of all Vegeta's favorite foods. Coming around the counter to where he was standing, she wrapped her arms around his waist, pulling herself close to his body in a tight hug. Wrinkling her nose at the smell of his strong perspiration, Bulma tried to ignore the musky scent Vegeta was giving off at the moment. She had gotten used to the fact the Vegeta had bad BO, especially when he came in from training in the Gravity Room. However, he had gotten very good about showering when he came in the house, so she could ignore it once in a while when he came straight to the kitchen after training. Sighing, she leaned her head on Vegeta's shoulder. Secretly she grinned when she felt one of his arms come around her back, using his hand to gently rub small circles in the small of her back like she preferred. For how much he said he didn't like physical attention, especially in public places such as the kitchen and in front of her mother no less, Vegeta had his own small ways of returning the favors Bulma bestowed upon him in less then obvious ways. Bulma knew how important it was for Vegeta to maintain his unfeeling exterior to everyone except for his close circle of intimates so she never pushed him to be more expressive then he was comfortable with.

Finally, after a few seconds of attention, Vegeta pushed his mate away from his body. She was acting almost a little too affectionate, which meant she either felt guilty about making his night a hell on earth or she was still trying to get to the bottom of his secret plan. Whatever it was, he couldn't afford to let her smooth moves get the better of him.

Ignoring Bulma's slightly pained expression, Vegeta moved over to the table and sat down, ignoring Mrs. Brief's foolish behavior as she tittered about how cute he and Bulma looked together.

"Well, are you just going to stand there Woman or are you going to bring me my breakfast?" Vegeta asked calmly.

Hearing his tone of voice, Bulma felt herself bristling up. Ugh, he was such a jerk sometimes! Here she had all but tried to make up for her behavior yesterday afternoon and night and he threw it back in her face! Walking up behind Vegeta, she tried to slap him upside his pointy haired head only to have Vegeta grab her arm before she could strike him.

"Ohhh, Vegeta! Let me go you big lummox! Last time I checked, you had two feet and two legs, so go get your own breakfast from the stove!"

"I thought you were trying to appease me Woman for your insufferable behavior last night. I know that's the only reason you came up to me and administered physical affection in front of your mother." Vegeta said as he looked at Mrs. Briefs out of the corner of his eye. Focusing his gaze back on the fiery beauty standing to the side of him, he smirked arrogantly at her. Dropping his gaze to her bountiful womanly attributes, he lowered his voice. "If you really want to make it up to me, you can bring me my breakfast like a good mate would do and then you can follow me upstairs when I go take my shower." With that, he growled slightly and let go of her arm, almost smiling when he saw the flushed expression on Bulma's face. It was easy and rather enjoyable to rile her up. In fact, it was one of the reasons he enjoyed being mated to the wench. Crossing his arms, he waited for her to cave into his demand, knowing that whatever had prompted her to hug him, even though he was sweaty and smelly, would get her to bring him his breakfast. He casually watched her as she rolled her eyes and did exactly what he had asked. 'Hopefully,' Vegeta thought to himself, 'she'll go along with the second part as well. It would certainly put me in a better frame of mind when I have to meet up with Kakarot to go over our training plan.' A man could only dream.

Vegeta started to shovel his breakfast into his mouth with relish. Both Bulma and her mother had outdone themselves, making a breakfast buffet that was sumptuous enough to satisfy royalty such as himself. "Huh, if Kakarot and I could learn how to cook like this, we'd win hands down." Vegeta thought as he rolled around a bite of eggs benedict on his tongue, savoring the combination of flavors before he swallowed it. How hard could it be? So engrossed was he in his thoughts and the prospect of engorging his empty, growling stomach, he didn't realize Bulma had taken a break from cooking and was currently sitting across from him watching him as he ate with a bemused look upon her face.

"Ugh, it never ceases to amaze me how you can pack away that much food in your small frame without gaining an ounce of fat. If I ate like that, I'd probably die of a heart attack and they'd have to knock down a wall to carry my body out of here with a crane." Vegeta just grunted at her comment. Rolling her eyes at his rudeness, Bulma started the conversation up again. Looking at the clock, she realized it was past the time that Trunks usually showed up for breakfast. "Hey Vegeta, where's Trunks? Didn't you train with him this morning?" Bulma asked, her eyes narrowed as she saw a slight flush of color rise up into Vegeta's cheeks. 'Great! I bet Trunks said something that pissed Vegeta off and now he's hiding in his room and Vegeta's feeling guilty because I'm going to yell at him. Why did I pick such a temperamental husband, Dende? Why?' Bulma thought to herself. "Well, are you going to answer me or are you going to pretend that you don't have ears, either?"

Swallowing another forkful of breakfast delicacies, Vegeta looked at Bulma's annoyed countenance. "He did train with me, if you call whining and complaining training. I told him to leave because he was wasting my time with his incessant griping. He came in here and went up to his room to sulk like the spoiled brat he is." Looking at the heated expression that was beginning to spread across Bulma's face, Vegeta continued on before she could interrupt him with her shrill shrieking. "Look Woman, I know what you're going to say. You're going to say that I should go easy on him, that he has a life beyond training and that I should be more 'affectionate.' Well, he should know how I truly feel about him. If I thought he wasn't worth the time of day, I wouldn't wake up early just to spend one on one training time with him, now would I? But all he does is act like it's some sort of Chinese water torture." With that said, Vegeta finished what was on his plate and stood up. Bulma still looked like she wanted to chew him out, but he wasn't going to give her a chance. Crossing his arms, he looked at her, one of his eyebrows cocked in a self-assured manner. "Well Woman, are you going to follow me up to the shower, or are you going to stare at the wall all day? I have things to do."

Bulma just stared at Vegeta moodily. 'He has things to do? Yeah right, and I bet they involve Goku.' Deciding to push her jealousy out of her mind, she felt herself weakening towards the prospect of showering with Vegeta. He always made it an interesting and stimulating experience. Making up her mind, Bulma stood up, pushed in her chair and walked around to where Vegeta was standing. Looking back over her shoulder where her mother was currently frying up a huge quantity of bacon to feed Trunks whenever he decided to make his presence known, Bulma addressed her. "Hey Mom, I'm going to take a breather and get cleaned up for work. I'll be down in a few."

"Sure thing, sweetie. You and Vegeta have a nice time together. It's so wonderful to see young couples so much in love!" Mrs. Briefs cooed as she mindlessly flipped the bacon that was about to scorch to the bottom of the pan. Bulma just rolled her eyes in exasperation and Vegeta almost gagged at the thought of Mrs. Briefs imagining what was happening between the two of them when they spent 'quality time' together. He still remembered the time not too long ago when he had had the impression that Mrs. Briefs was angling after him. To top it all off, he had somehow managed to acquire her as a mother-in-law. The only thing she had going for her, in Vegeta's opinion, was that she knew how to cook. Looking at his mate and her obnoxious mother, Vegeta tapped his foot impatiently.

"Hurry up Woman!"

"Alright already, I'm coming! It wouldn't hurt you to have a little patience once in a while, Vegeta!"

"Huh, look who's talking. You're the most impatient person I know!" With that, he turned around and headed towards the stairs, not waiting to see if Bulma was following. Upon reaching Bulma's and his domain, Vegeta glanced over his shoulder before opening the door, pleased to see that Bulma was right on his heels. Thinking of all the things he could do with her in the shower, Vegeta smiled wickedly to himself. Maybe today wasn't going to be so bad after all.

_About an hour and a half later…_

Vegeta stepped out of his room with a satisfied smirk plastered across his face. His shower with Bulma had been more fruitful than even he had imagined. She might make comments about how insatiable his appetites where but she was just as bad, if not worse. Also, she had an imagination that would make any man feel like they had died and gone to paradise. Letting out a small sigh of pleasure and contentment, making sure no one was around to hear it, Vegeta made his way downstairs, happy to note that everyone had cleared out of the house. All in all, it worked out conveniently well with his revised training plan for the day. Bulma had taken Trunks to school and was then heading to a branch office of Capsule Corporation in Ginger Town. Mrs. Briefs had left to attend a stupid Rotary Club meeting dealing with the beautification of Satan City and wouldn't be back until suppertime. And Dr. Briefs was down in the lab puttering around on Dende knew what and most likely wouldn't put in an appearance until late at night when Mrs. Briefs went down to drag him up to bed. Which meant Vegeta had unlimited access to the entire house without having to worry about the possible discovery of his new found obsession by an overly inquisitive family. Now all he had to do was wait for Kakarot to finally show up. Growling in irritation, Vegeta glanced at the grandfather clock that was taking up space in the hallway he was currently in. The idiot should have been here almost two hours ago. It was getting to the point of ridiculousness how tardy Kakarot seemed to constantly be. Just when Vegeta was planning on going out to the Gravity Room and locking Goku out, he heard a large thunk and a crash coming from the living room. Making his way there, Vegeta stepped into the room, only to see Kakarot sprawled across the floor with one of Mrs. Briefs numerous potted plants broken on top of his oversized head.

"Kakarot, you idiot! What on earth are you doing lying on the floor like that? And why are you so late? I was under the impression that you wanted to participate in this moronic contest, yet you have failed to show up on time two days in a row. You had better explain yourself and it had better be good!" Vegeta yelled at the warrior, who was slowly gaining his footing underneath him, brushing excess potting soil and plant material off of his trademark orange fighting gi. He did not have patience for indolent nincompoops, especially when time was of the essence and secrecy was essential for success.

"Sorry Vegeta, I can explain," Goku said nervously as he pulled part of the plant he had the misfortune of crashing into out of his wild hair. "I didn't want you to get in trouble with Bulma again, so I decided to show up later using instant transmission. Besides that, Chi-Chi was on a rampage this morning and I had to do some stuff for her around the house. You know what it's like." Goku mentioned as he rubbed his foot nervously in the dirt that was spewed across the floor, looking at Vegeta and hoping he wouldn't blow a gasket. Even though he and Vegeta where friends in a strange sort of way, Goku knew he still possessed a really short temper, and when it went off, it was enough to scare even the most battle scarred warrior away. He was relieved when Vegeta just snorted in disdain and motioned with his hand for Goku to follow him out of the house.

When they reached the Gravity Room, Vegeta told Goku to stay put as he went inside to gather their notes from the day before. Bringing them with him, he locked down the Gravity Room and walked towards the kitchen. Curious, Goku decided to find out what the plan was for today.

"So, ah, Vegeta, what are we going to be doing today?"

Grumbling slightly, Vegeta opened the door to the kitchen, waiting slightly for Goku to follow him inside. Setting their materials down on the kitchen table that was now clean and orderly, showing no sign that the Briefs family had all been in there less than an hour before, Vegeta ushered Goku over to a chair. Seating himself, he waited for the dimwit to take the hint and follow suit. Once both he and Kakarot were seated, Vegeta decided it was time to clue him into his revised plan.

"Alright Kakarot, listen up. I don't want to have to explain myself more then necessary, so pay attention baka. Here's the deal. My mate and her obnoxious family have all left the premises for the better part of the day. This just happens to coincide nicely with our secret activity. Right now, we are going to read through the notes we took yesterday, making sure to take special note of anything that might be relevant to aiding our cause for our enemy's imminent defeat. Afterwards, I've decided that perhaps it is best if we try our hand at making something edible while we don't have to worry about anyone interrupting. Got that?"

"Really Vegeta? We're going to cook? I'm so excited!" Goku cried out happily. He didn't know why the prospect of cooking was suddenly so interesting, but if the crazy chefs on _The Iron Chef_ could do it, so could he.

"Calm down moron. I said we are going to attempt to make something edible, but only after we go over our notes and make sure we have a good idea about what we are going to be up against. Now start reading!"

With that, the two of them spent the better part of an hour cataloging anything that might become useful in their future battle in Kitchen Stadium. Seeing that Kakarot was twiddling his thumbs and staring off into outer space, Vegeta decided to see if he had actually managed to come up with something relevant.

"Well Kakarot, since you seem to be finished, what did you come up with?"

"Well, I noticed that each chef has a distinct cooking style. I don't really know how we can use that to our advantage though." Since neither of them actually knew how to cook, to Goku, it didn't really matter what style of cooking their enemy used. But Vegeta had a different take on the matter.

"Fool, use your head! They each have a different style that they use exclusively, which means they are more rigid. It's just like martial arts. The best fighters are the ones that know how to adapt to the situation at hand. So what if we don't know how to cook at the moment? We will learn how. Not having a distinct style is our trump card. The judges won't know what to expect from us. We can work on coming up with food that will counter the dishes that each iron chef might prepare with the secret ingredient."

"Hey, that's really great Vegeta! I guess I didn't think of it like that!"

Smirking confidently at Goku, Vegeta countered his statement with a smart aleck reply. "Of course it's great thinking. How could you expect anything less from a Prince?" Vegeta replied arrogantly.

Goku just shook his head, taking Vegeta superior attitude in stride. Looking at his list, he saw another comment that he had put a little star by.

"Uh, I guess I took note at how many battles each chef has won. Each one has lost at least once, so they aren't unbeatable."

"Very good Kakarot. Maybe you can use your head in a useful fashion after all," Vegeta mentioned, slightly amazed at how well the idiot was actually doing. "Yes, I also took down notes on each battle for each chef. Statistically, we have the best chance of beating that Morimoto baka since he has won the least. But I have a feeling that whoever we end up against will be purely by chance. Since they are used to competing in their home court, it won't really matter who we end up against because they will have the advantage of knowing where everything they will need to use is located. What else?"

"Well, the last thing I guess I thought was important is the whole secret ingredient thing. Neither one of us is going to know what secret ingredient we are going to get until the contest begins."

Vegeta nodded appreciatively at Goku's comment. "Exactly. The secret ingredient can work either way for us. If the chef we are competing against has an arsenal of expertise cooking with the secret ingredient that will be very bad. But if they don't, we both have the same advantage. Also, I think I have a plan on how we should go about training for the secret ingredient."

Goku looked at Vegeta, waiting for his idea because he had no clue how they were going to proceed. After looking through his notes, he was beginning to feel that there was no way they were even going to make it onto the show, much less compete in it. So it was very encouraging that Vegeta had come up with something.

"What's your idea Vegeta?"

Vegeta closed his eyes, relishing the fact that the ever unbeatable Kakarot was finally realizing how intellectually superior he was, conveniently forgetting the fact that he had seriously considered not participating in the loco event at all. Opening his eyes, he watched as Kakarot nervously toyed with the piece of paper sitting in front of him.

"My idea is quite elementary. The first thing we need to do is figure out how to use this kitchen. If that halfwit mother-in-law of mine can make her way around here everyday, then we should be able to as well. How hard can it be? That's why I think we should try to make something simple, to get a feel of how humans go about with cooking. Then, once we have the basics down, we can start trying to cook things using a different secret ingredient everyday. The only thing we have to work out will be when we can practice as it is completely dependent upon whether or not our mates are around."

"Hey, that's great! Boy, I'm sure glad I convinced you to do this with me Vegeta, otherwise I think I'd be up the creek without a paddle." Rubbing his head, Goku eagerly waited to find out when they were going to start cooking.

Standing up, Vegeta stretched out his muscles. It was hard work having to share a table with nervous, overactive Saiyan who continually drove him up the wall. Walking around the kitchen facilities, he made note of what and where everything was. He knew the refrigerator like the back of his hand, since he was constantly forging for something to eat. He also knew that the stove and oven were where most of the cooking was done. He had been in the pantry before and knew that Mrs. Briefs stored non-perishable items in there. Gathering the information up into his head, he pointed everything out to Goku.

"Hey, great! I've always been envious of this kitchen. Chi-Chi would kill to be able to cook in a place like this." Goku said as he rubbed his hands in anticipation. This was going to be great. "So Vegeta, what are we going to try and cook today?"

"What are we going to cook?" Vegeta repeated back to Goku.

"Yeah, you said we were going to practice. So what did you have in mind?"

Suddenly Vegeta realized that he had no idea what would be simple to make. Watching Mrs. Briefs and Bulma cook, they made it look so easy and effortless. Vegeta began to sweat nervously when Goku kept staring at him, waiting for his answer. In an attempt to gain control of the situation, Vegeta decided to take out his nervous frustration on the unfortunate Saiyan standing in front of him.

"What did I have in mind? How the hell should I know? I'm not the only one participating in this thing, in case you haven't forgotten Kakarot! Besides, it was your idea in the first place. Maybe you should come up with something!" Vegeta yelled out in a huff.

Looking surprised at Vegeta's outburst, Goku took a step back. "Hey Vegeta, calm down. I just thought since you had everything else planned out, you would have had this thought out too." Seeing that Vegeta was glaring at him with a death look in his eyes, Goku hurriedly continued on. "I can think up something that's good. What am I in the mood for?" Sticking his tongue out of his mouth and scratching his chin in concentration, Goku suddenly got an idea. "Hey, I got it! Why don't we bake a cake? That would be a good starting point, don't you think?"

Vegeta just looked at him irritably. A cake? Sure, they tasted good, but Vegeta had no idea how to go about making one. Like he had said before to Kakarot, cooking was for women and sissies, so he had never seriously observed how it was done until they watched _Iron Chef_ the other day. Now he suddenly wished he had been more observant.

Trying to cover up his lack of expertise, Vegeta decided to lay the responsibility of starting the cake on Goku's shoulders. Crossing his arms, he looked over at where Goku was standing and picking more debris from the plant that had landed on him off of his clothing.

"Fine Kakarot, we'll bake a cake. Since it's your brilliant idea, why don't you start it?" It would be interesting to see if he actually knew how to do something besides fight and eat.

"Okay Vegeta. No problem. First things first: we need to wear aprons so we stay clean."

Vegeta looked over at Goku skeptically. "Aprons to stay clean? Look at yourself idiot. I don't think you can get any dirtier."

"Yeah, I guess that's true, but when Chi-Chi cooks, she always wears an apron, so we should too. I thought I saw some hanging up in the pantry you showed me." Opening the door, Goku came out wearing a frilly pink thing around his waist that had hearts embroidered all over it. It looked absolutely repulsive to Vegeta. It was then that he noticed Kakarot was carrying an almost identical piece of material in one of his hands. Narrowing his eyes suspiciously, Vegeta decided to find out what Goku had in mind.

"What repulsive thing are you carrying Kakarot?"

"Another apron for you to wear, Vegeta." With that, Goku tried to hand it to Vegeta, only to almost have his hand vaporized when Vegeta ki blasted the offending pink piece of material. If there was one thing Vegeta hated, it was the color pink. Having once had to endure wearing the humiliating color in front of the entire Z-squad because Bulma had put his training gear in the wash, he had vowed never again to have anything to do with the offensive color.

"What'd you do that for Vegeta? You almost took off my hand! And now you won't be able to wear an apron." Goku replied shakily.

Growling at Goku, Vegeta watched as the chard remains of Mrs. Briefs apron hit the floor of the kitchen. "You of all people should know that I don't like being made a fool of and wearing that thing would definitely make me look like a fool. Just forget about the stupid apron. We don't have time to waste, so let's get moving!"

"Right. Okay, well, when Chi-Chi makes a cake, she usually follows a recipe out of a book. I think I saw one in the pantry next to where the aprons were. I'll go grab it." With that, Goku hurriedly went into the pantry and retrieved Mrs. Briefs prized cookbook. Handing the book over to Vegeta, he watched as the smaller Saiyan thumbed through the index looking for a cake recipe.

"Here Kakarot, this one looks simple enough. It's even called simple. Simple Yellow Cake." Putting the book down, both Saiyans looked at the list of ingredients. Going into the fridge and the pantry, they gathered everything they needed.

"Alright, it says we need to sift the flour into a mixing bowl and add all the other ingredients in order, making sure to fold in the eggs." Goku muttered out loud to himself as he read through the recipe.

Looking at the same recipe, Vegeta decided the directions were stupid. Why bother going through the trouble of following the steps exactly when they were on a time constraint? Not looking at Goku, Vegeta grabbed the cookbook and slammed it shut, surprising Goku with his sudden movement.

"Hey Vegeta, what are you doing? We need this book to make our cake!"

"Look Kakarot, we have all the information we need. So let's get down to business." Grabbing a bowl, Vegeta quickly dumped all the ingredients they had gathered into it, not bothering to measure them out accurately. Smashing them all together with his fist, he had Goku grab a pan from one of the cupboards, not bothering to see if it was the right size or not. Pouring the disgusting looking batter into the oversized pan, Vegeta then shoved it into the oven, doubling the temperature that was suggested in the book, thinking it would take half the time to bake. With that done, they just had to sit and wait for their creation to finish baking.

"Well, Vegeta, I hope it turns out, but I have a feeling it's not going to." Goku said sadly as he sat down across from Vegeta, his frilly pink apron still snug around his waist.

Glaring back it his partner, angry that he didn't have faith in his cooking skills, Vegeta decided to ignore Goku's ignorant assumption. Unfortunately for Vegeta, Goku's prediction turned out to be accurate. They had only been sitting at the table for about ten minutes, when Vegeta began to smell something burning. Sniffing, he turned around and yelled in surprise when he saw smoke coming out of the oven. Running over to the oven, he opened it quickly, letting all of the smoke come surging out of the door.

"Quick Kakarot, grab it!" With that, Goku ran to the stove and pulled out the burning cake without taking the time to grab hot pads. As soon as he grabbed the cake, he realized his mistake.

"Ouch, ouch, hot, _hot_, **_hot_**!" Goku yelled as he tried to simultaneously blow out the fire and cool off his burning hands. He didn't realize he was running around the kitchen like a chicken with his head cut off until he heard Vegeta shout at him to throw it in the sink. With that, Goku launched the fiery inferno out of his hands into the waiting receptacle. As soon as he let go, he let out an ear splitting scream as he looked at his blistered, painful hands. Glancing over to where Vegeta was standing, he watched as the smaller Saiyan quickly doused their fiery creation with water from the tap. The fire went out with a loud hiss, steam billowing up and over the kitchen sink. It was then that he noticed the expression on Vegeta's face after he had put the fire out. No longer looking at the remains of their failed cooking attempt, he was staring nervously in the direction where Goku was standing. Turning around slowly, Goku gawked in fright as he saw exactly what Vegeta was looking at. Swallowing apprehensively, he slowly turned around to where Vegeta was standing with his hand still on the sink faucet.

"Vegeta, I think we're in trouble."

_Ooh, busted! But by who? Will this spell the end of Goku and Vegeta's attempt at their secret plan? To find out, you'll have to read the next installment. And as always, please, please read and review!!!_


	4. Caught in the Act

**Yeah! Here's the next chapter in this silly story! Sorry it took me a while to update, but I've been busy with school and the holidays along with updating my other story. Hope you enjoy and aren't too disappointed by the person I chose to discover the dangerous duo.**

**And thanks to Pitkat, Funky Platypus, Cappuccino Penguin, SuperMysticWarrior, Bulma and Vegeta fan, faithfulkitty, and Gohans-saiyagirl for reading and reviewing my story!**

**Oh yeah, **_this denotes telepathic communication._ **Just to let you know:)**

**Disclaimer: Don't own DBZ or Iron Chef America**

_**Caught in the Act**_

It was almost noon and Bulma was in an extremely angry state of mind, mostly with herself and her father, who had no organizational skills, whatsoever. Tapping her fingers impatiently on the steering wheel of the air car she was in, she revved the engine and took off at lightning speed as soon as the stoplight she was stuck at turned red. Pushing her short bangs out of her face, she almost wished she hadn't given up smoking those many years ago when she had been pregnant with Trunks. What she wouldn't give for a good drag on a cigarette to calm down her frazzled nerves.

All in all, her corporate meeting at Gingertown had been a complete and total disaster and Bulma did not like being made out to be a fool, especially in front of the male CEO in charge of the company Capsule Corp. was trying to buy out. Yet she had been so preoccupied with Vegeta in the shower that she had lost track of time, not realizing how late it had gotten and the fact that she had to take Trunks to school. Throwing on her clothes as best she could, she had left the house without her presentation materials to give in front of the board of directors in charge of the company in Gingertown. On top of that, her father had written down the wrong time, so she was over an hour late for her meeting. Now they had to reschedule the whole damn thing and Bulma had wasted most of her morning running around on a fool's errand. She was going to strangle her absent-minded father when she got home and then she was going to ream Vegeta out for being such a pervert first thing in the morning. Glancing up, she noticing that her exit was upon her. Cutting across three lanes of traffic, Bulma ignoring the horns blaring at her for her rudeness as she dangerously made her way towards the exit. She really didn't care. Zooming down the exit, she made a short cut across traffic seeing Capsule Corp. straight ahead. Not bothering to stop at the stop sign in front of her home, Bulma flew into the driveway and slammed on the breaks, watching in satisfaction as dust and gravel flew up into the air. Stepping out of the car, she encapsulated it and made her way towards the main entrance of the house, brushing off stray dirt that had settled onto her expensive Armani suit.

Walking towards the house, Bulma paused and glanced over at the spaceship that housed Vegeta's Gravity Room. Putting her index finger to her lip, she tried to figure out what it was that was strange about the GR when she realized she couldn't hear the almost constant hum that meant Vegeta was inside sweating up a storm while he beat his body up to a bloody pulp. Looking at her watch, she was a little perplexed because it was only around eleven thirty in the morning, a little too early for her husband to be in the house looking for a meal. Then again, he had been acting strange the last couple of days so maybe this was just another sign that something was seriously wrong with Vegeta. Shrugging her shoulders carelessly, she continued on her journey back to the house. Already deciding that she was going to take a nice, hot, and relaxing dip in the hot tub to unwind, she opened the door to the house, trying to make her way in without being waylaid by Vegeta.

Stepping across the threshold, Bulma carefully set her briefcase down next to an extremely ugly potted cactus that her mother had bought, thinking it looked divine sitting where everyone who came into the house could admire it. The only thing Bulma thought it had going for it was that someone (most likely Trunks) had placed it extremely close to the door. Unless you knew it was there, it was unavoidable that you would run into the offending plant. Needless to say, many a salesperson or solicitor had stepped through the doorway only to have their thighs or rear ends end up full of cactus spines. It had definitely helped reduce the amount of unwanted guests that showed up to Capsule Corp. looking for money and so Bulma tolerated it as a necessary evil.

Letting out a tired sigh, Bulma rubbed her eyes and then thought of all the positives associated with leaving the meeting early. Okay, perhaps it wasn't so great that both she and her father had screwed up as they could possibly be out of a large amount of money if the deal didn't go through. But she was home alone except for Vegeta, who she could avoid if necessary. There weren't many times when Bulma could say she had the house to herself. Her mother was usually always around trying to get her to go to stupid scrap booking parties or cooking classes and Trunks was a holy terror, constantly trying to play practical jokes on everyone in her entire family. Yes, she was going to take advantage of this rare occurrence to the fullest extent possible and to hell with the consequences! Straightening out her resolve, she started to make her way towards the stairs that led to her family's upstairs apartments when she suddenly stopped and turned around slowly. Sniffing the air, she realized that something smelled like it was burning. Thinking her father had possibly blown something up in his basement lab, Bulma started heading towards that direction when she heard noises coming from the kitchen. Curious, Bulma switched directions. Who would be in the kitchen at this time of the day? Her mom was gone and she seriously doubted Vegeta would be in there doing something. I mean, come on! He was the manliest man she knew, and having to cook his own food was beneath his dignity.

Stepping closer to the door, Bulma was about to dismiss her idea that someone was in the kitchen when she heard the unmistakable voices of both Goku and her husband loud and crystal clear. And what they were saying to each other made Bulma's gut clench in sickness and in fear of what she would discover when she opened the kitchen door. They had been acting extremely suspicious the last couple of days. She had caught them holding hands and they had spent all day yesterday in the Gravity Room, yet she was convinced they hadn't 'trained' in their usual fashion. Then, on top of everything else, there was the fact that Vegeta suddenly seemed interested in spending an inordinate amount of time with Goku, who he usually avoided like the plague. Something was definitely up, and this time, she wasn't going to feel guilty for interrupting their little affair. A married woman could only take so much, especially when she heard:

"Quick Kakarot, grab it!"_ (Vegeta)_

"Ouch, ouch, hot, hot, **hot**!"_ (Goku)_

Honestly, what else was she supposed to think was going on between the two of them? Focusing on her anger and perceived betrayal by the only man she had ever truly loved (even though he could be the biggest ass this side of the galaxy), Bulma rolled up her sleeves and kicked open the door with one of her spiky, high heeled shoes, ready to administer lethal damage on the unsuspecting duo. So prepared was she to discover Vegeta and Goku in a very disgusting and compromising position, the sight that actually assaulted her eyes almost put her over the edge. The last thing she had expected to see was Vegeta standing by the sink putting out something that was obviously on fire and Goku wearing her mother's apron blowing on his burned hands.

Looking incredulously at Vegeta and then at Goku, Bulma felt her jaw drop in both utter confusion and disbelief. Her mind still couldn't grasp what was going on. Standing there staring at the guilty looking pair, Bulma felt herself spacing out of reality. Fortuitously for her, both Goku and Vegeta took her astonished silence as the calm before a storm ready to unleash a torrential downpour.

Goku, seeing Bulma's expression, swallowed nervously. He knew she was going to go berserk, and by the look on Vegeta's face, his counterpart had the same feeling of dread. Ordinarily, facing Bulma was intimidating, but having to face her when she was enraged was terrifying. Trying to diffuse the situation, Goku said the only thing that came to his mind.

"Vegeta, I think we're in trouble." That phrase was all it took for Bulma to snap back to reality. But instead of screaming and ranting at the two of them, she did something that completely surprised both Goku and Vegeta: she started to laugh. First, it was a chuckle. Then it moved lower so that her belly started to move. Before long, her whole body was affected by the contagious laugh as she fell over and started rolling around on the floor, laughing hysterically, not caring that she was dirtying up her designer suit.

"Ha, ha, Oh..hahahahah My God, hahahaha! Vegeta, hahahahah, Goku,hahahaha! This, haha, is….haha…too….much…HAHAHA!" Bulma cackled as she sat up on the floor, trying to stop laughing before she peed her pants or burst a lung. But the sight of them was too funny for words. If she had had a camera with her, she would have taken a picture of how ridiculous the both of them looked. Letting out a long breath, Bulma leaned back on her arms and glanced over at Goku, who looked mortified, and Vegeta, who looked pissed off.

"Are you done laughing yet Woman or do I have to blast you to permanently shut you up?" Vegeta growled out at her. Ignoring his tone of voice, Bulma tried to get a handle on her thoughts. But all she could think about was that she needed to know what they were doing in her kitchen setting the place on fire. And she had a sneaking suspicion it had something to do with their strange behavior the last coupled of days. Besides that, she was suddenly relieved that her suspicions were unfounded. She should have known that Vegeta wouldn't cheat on her, especially with another man, but then again, he had shared a body with Goku and who knew what went on in the minds of Saiyans. Shaking her head to rid herself of such disgusting thoughts, she stood up shakily and made her way to one of the kitchen chairs, settling herself in.

Vegeta glared at Bulma as she walked towards the table. Why wouldn't she just leave? Grinding his teeth in exasperation, he knew she was about to rake both he and Kakarot across the coals. Normally, he wouldn't have cared a whit, but his pride was at stake and he knew that Kakarot wouldn't be able to keep his fat mouth shut once Bulma started interrogating them. What a flipping disaster! Why couldn't he have better luck? Deciding to beat Bulma to the punch, Vegeta moved away from the sink that held the damaging evidence. Moving in closer to where Bulma was calmly sitting, he spread his legs apart and crossed his arms, trying to make himself look as intimidating as possible.

"Woman, what the hell are you doing here? Don't you have some sort of ridiculous meeting you're supposed to be at?" Vegeta snarled at Bulma.

Giving Vegeta a cool look, Bulma calmly dusted off her now dirty suit before deciding to answer him. She wasn't going to play games with him anymore. The two of them had a lot of explaining to do and she was sick of trying to figure out what exactly it was they were up to.

"Oh, can the attitude Vegeta! I don't have to explain to you why I'm home earlier than I expected. I'm not the one engaging in secret activities, now am I? No, the way I see it, the both of you have a lot of explaining to do. You've already ruined the kitchen once before Vegeta and I don't particularly want to have to redo it a second time because you've suddenly decided to try and learn how to cook. That _was_ what the two of you were doing in here, right? Or maybe you were doing something a little more intimate and are just trying to cover your tracks?"

Vegeta blushed slightly, suddenly getting the meaning behind Bulma's second question. How could she even begin to think such a thing? She'd spent half of the morning with him in the shower and besides that, they were bonded together. But then again, she was human and what could he expect from an overly imaginative one at that? Still, such a thought was unpardonable in Vegeta's mind. Stepping in even closer, he shoved his hands onto the edge of the table and made it so he was face to face with his reclining mate.

"What exactly are you insinuating Woman?"

"Nothing, nothing at all Vegeta." Bulma calmly said, as she looked him straight in the eye. Seeing the heated look in his eyes only started to fluster her, making her think of other things the two of them could be doing.

"Good, at least we understand one another." With that, Vegeta straightened up before he decided to haul Bulma back up to their rooms. Ugh, he was so pathetically weak around her it wasn't even funny. Grunting slightly, he turned his back to her. "You can leave anytime Woman!" He wasn't surprised when he heard her reply.

"No way! You are both going to explain to me what it is you have been doing in secret for the last three days. Once that's done, then I'll think about leaving." Bulma yelled at Vegeta's back, crossing her arms in anger. Deciding she wasn't going to get anywhere with him, she decided to try an brow beat Goku, who was holding his hands tenderly, looking at the two of them nervously. Smiling maliciously, Bulma directed her next question to the other cowering Saiyan, knowing she could get him to open up without too much difficulty. Raising her eyebrow, she watched gleefully as Goku started to sweat nervously from her undivided attention.

"So Goku, since Vegeta's being a pill and won't let me in on your little secret, why don't you explain what's going on. You wouldn't want me to have the wrong idea, now would you?" Bulma asked in a deceptively sweet tone of voice.

Seeing that Vegeta was still ignoring Bulma and having the distinct feeling that Bulma wasn't going to let them off the hook until she got some serious answers, Goku was torn. He knew if he spilled the beans, Vegeta wouldn't speak to him for the rest of his natural life and they wouldn't be competing in the competition together. But if he didn't tell Bulma, he knew she would do something to make his life equally miserable by telling Chi-Chi something that would make her go over the edge. Deciding there was no hope for it, Goku opened his mouth.

"It's like this Bulma…"

"_Kakarot, you baka! Don't tell her if you want to live to see another day!"_

"It's like what Goku? I'm waiting!" Bulma asked, irritated that the big oaf had to start daydreaming in the middle of his train of thought.

Tapping his foot nervously, Goku glanced over to where Vegeta was standing resolutely with his back turned to Bulma. Shoving his hands through his hair and then regretting the action when they started to smart, he backed away from Bulma's intimidating presence.

"Uhhhh, like, uhhhh…"

"_Vegeta, I can't help it! She caught us red handed, literally! And I don't want to be in trouble with Chi-Chi. No offense, but your wife has a natural talent for being a first class witch!"_

"What's wrong with you Goku? Does the cat have your tongue? This is getting ridiculous. I have better things to be doing, like relaxing in the hot tub!" Bulma huffed out impatiently as she watched Goku continue to retreat. If she didn't know any better, she could swear he was talking to himself. Letting out an exasperated sigh, she ran her hands through her hair and then started to pick at her perfectly manicured fingernails. Ugh!

"So why don't you go and spend time in the stupid hot tub? No one asked you to stay!" Vegeta grunted out sourly. Why couldn't she just leave already?

Turning her head so she faced Vegeta, Bulma narrowed her eyes at his back, thoroughly tempted to stick a dagger in it. "Stay out of this conversation between Goku and myself unless you've decided to contribute some vital information." All she got in return was a rude grunt. Throwing her hands in the air, she again focused her attention back to Goku who looked like he was trying to blend into the wall.

"Like I was saying Goku, I have better things I could be doing. If you don't want me to call Chi-Chi up and tell her you've been avoiding her, then you had better tell me what is going on between yourself and my stubborn, stuck-up husband or else!"

Goku groaned. That was it. He didn't care how angry Vegeta was going to be with him, he couldn't take much more of Bulma's brow beating. Besides which, he knew she was completely serious about her threat and the last thing he wanted to deal with when he got home was an enraged Chi-Chi. Shoving his hands forward in a gesture of supplication, Goku decided to concede the victory over their battle of wills to Bulma.

"Fine, I'll tell you everything."

"_Kakarot, you had better not or you can forget ever coming over to this house to spar again!"_

"_Look, I'm sorry Vegeta, but I can only take so much. I wasn't kidding when I told you I think Bulma's scary and I really don't want to have to spend the rest of the night being chased around my house by Chi-Chi holding a frying pan." _With that, Goku centered all of his attention back onto the gloating female sitting before him, ignoring the guilty feeling that he had somehow betrayed his friendship with Vegeta. He didn't even look over at Vegeta, who had now turned around and was glaring at him with a mixture of loathing and embarrassment in his dark and penetrating gaze.

Trying to ignore the urge to scratch his head lest he hurt his painful hands, Goku let out a weary sigh before he continued on with his explanation. "It's like this Bulma. I've been watching this really great competitive cooking show called _Iron Chef_. Well, they're having a contest where ordinary viewers can try out and maybe be able to get on the show and compete against one of the show's iron chefs. I thought it would be really fun to try and get on the show with Vegeta. I convinced him to join up with me and we've been, uh, devising a training regimen to help us get on the show. That's what we've been doing. Vegeta didn't want you to know about it, so we've been doing it in secret, but you caught us, so I guess the game is up, and my dreams of getting on the show are history!" Goku felt like crying he was so disappointed. After spilling the beans, he knew there was no way Vegeta would ever trust him enough to go through with the competition. Besides that, Bulma knew and he had a feeling everyone else in the Z-squad was going to know before long. He didn't think Vegeta or even himself would be able to live with the humiliation of starting something and not finishing it with everyone knowing about their failure. What a mess the two of them were in. Looking sadly at Bulma, Goku started to head towards the door before Vegeta decided to blast him for his betrayal. "I guess I'll be leaving then!" He had only gone a few steps when Bulma piped up.

"Hey Goku, where are you going?"

"Home. I know where I'm not wanted." He said sulkily.

"Oh for Dende's sake, stop being such a baby! Besides, your hands are hurt. Didn't you have the sense to use hotpads when you took whatever it was the two of you concocted out of the oven? Well, I suppose since it's you, the answer is obviously no. Get back over here mister." With that, Bulma stood up and snagged Vegeta with her arm as he tried to sneak past her on his way outside. "Not so fast buster! I didn't give either of you two troublemakers permission to leave. Now stay put!" Shaking her head in annoyance, she was slightly relieved when both Vegeta and Goku did as she commanded. Staring at the both of them, she decided what she had to say would go over easier for her if both of them were seated. Putting on her best scolding mother look, she motioned towards the table and ordered both of them to sit. If she didn't act tough, she knew neither one of them would give her the time of day. She let out a small sigh of relief when both Saiyans seated themselves at the kitchen table without a word of complaint.

"Okay boys. Here's what I think" Directing her look at Vegeta who looked like he would rather be pushing daisies than sitting here listening to her lecture, she continued on. "Why were you so afraid of my finding out about this Vegeta? What did you think I would do, tell everyone in the universe that the mighty Saiyan Prince has decided to learn how to cook?" Taking his grunt as a yes, she let out a long breath, feeling somewhat upset that he would think such a thing about her. "Look Vegeta, I respect your privacy. You of all people should know that! We've only been married for what, ten years? Anyway, you didn't have to go through all of this trouble to keep it hidden from me. Even now, I promise I won't tell anyone."

Vegeta looked up at Bulma, who honestly looked like she was hurt he hadn't shared his little secret with her. Well, she did have a big mouth, and more importantly, he didn't want her thinking he was some kind of pansy.

"What does it matter if you don't tell anyone Bulma? This was a stupid idea and I was an idiot for even agreeing to it in the first place. It's over with and I'm going outside to do some real training!" With that, he tried to get up, only to be shoved back into his seat by Bulma.

"Not so fast! I..am..not.._finished_! Ugh, you are such a bonehead sometimes Vegeta! You can't just back out of something because a crimp happened in your perfect plan. Besides, I know you Vegeta. You aren't the type of person who gives up when you have your heart set on something. If you give up now, you'll regret it, and the last thing I need is for you to fall into a self-pitying state similar to the one you where in when idiot boy over there died after the Cell Games."

"Come on Woman! I'm not that much of a weakling that I would do something like that. Now you're just being foolish!" Vegeta yelled at Bulma, not caring that his tone of voice was making both Kakarot and his harpy of mate cringe. What did she think he was, some sort of retard who needed hand holding? He was a Saiyan Prince and he did have his pride.

"Would you just shut up and let me finish? You are so impossible sometimes I don't even know why I put up with you!" Bulma yelled as she gave Vegeta the evil eye, watching as he shut his mouth with an audible click. Satisfied he was going to listen, she directed her attention to both men seated in front of her.

"Alright. Here's the deal. I think this is a superb idea! Why not learn how to cook? I mean, there are lots of really great chefs out there who are men. And I can totally see why the two of you would want to participate. It's just another form of competition and you two are the most competitive people I know. Besides, it has to get boring doing the same old training routine day after day after day. But if that thing in the sink is any indication of your cooking ability, you two need serious help if you have any intention whatsoever of getting on that show and kicking some serious butt. It looks like you were trying to cook rocks or something. Gross."

Goku felt himself cheering up. Yeah, Bulma could be scary, but since she was now married to Vegeta, it seemed she took most of her aggression out on him, which was fine by Goku. Besides that, when she got excited about something, she was a really motivating person and on top of that, she was extremely smart. Allowing himself to relax a bit, he leaned back in his chair, waiting to hear what else Bulma had to say. But Vegeta didn't look happy at all. In fact, it looked like he wanted to slowly torture and kill the woman standing in front of him. Rolling his eyes, he crossed his arms and gave Bulma a challenging look before he interjected his thoughts on the matter.

"So you don't think we have a chance of getting into the competition with our current cooking skills, do you? Well, then it's settled. Kakarot and I are too inept, as you put it, to compete, so the contest is out. And now that we have reached an understanding, I'm going out to the Gravity Room to release some of my aggression." He didn't get very far out of his chair before Bulma rounded on him, getting back in his face. Putting her hand on his chest, she shoved him back into the chair for a second time. By now, Vegeta was thoroughly pissed off and was about to teach his mate a lesson on who was in charge when Goku spoke up.

"Come on Vegeta! Maybe Bulma has a plan that will help us learn how to cook! Why don't you let her finish?" Turning his head to face Goku, Vegeta bared his teeth in anger, pushing Bulma away from him at the same time.

"I'll tell you what Kakarot, I'll let her finish when I'm good and ready to listen. I don't care whatever plan she has concocted. She wasn't part of the deal and the deal is now officially over. So why don't you use your instant transmission and get the hell out of my house before I blast you into a million pieces!" Honestly, he was sick of the two of them going on and on like a broken record over the whole thing. He had been humiliated in front of his mate and Kakarot and reneged on their agreement the moment that he told Bulma the entire truth. He didn't care if he was acting like a spoiled brat reminiscent of his son. He was sick of the two of them and if he didn't leave now, he was going to do something he would regret later. But neither Bulma nor Kakarot seemed to be getting where he was coming from because both of them spoke up at the same time.

"Vegeta!" They both yelled out in unison. Looking over at Bulma, Goku motioned for her to go ahead.

Smiling at him, Bulma turned her attention back to her angry and irate husband. "Blowing up Goku isn't going to solve your problem and on top of that, your acting exactly like Trunks does when he doesn't get his way. No wonder the two of you never get along. You're exactly the same! Anyway, what would it hurt for you to listen to what I have to say Vegeta? I already told you I think this is a fantastic idea, and if you think learning how to cook makes you look less masculine in my eyes, you are completely off the mark." Seeing and sensing that Bulma was being completely sincere, he let out a sigh of defeat.

"Fine Woman, hurry up and say your piece."

Sensing her small victory, Bulma inwardly grinned before she continued on. "Okay you two, I have an idea. Obviously, you two need to learn how to cook. I'd teach you, but I really don't have the time. However, I know someone who would be more than happy to give the two of you some much needed lessons, and I can make sure they won't tell a single living soul about what it is you two are doing. In fact, they'll work out perfectly because they can train you during the day when no one is about. I like the whole idea of an element of surprise, so don't worry about it Vegeta. Your secret will remain a secret, as long as the two of you don't blow your cover again." With that said, Bulma stepped back, putting her hands behind her back, waiting confidentially to find out what Goku and Vegeta would say about her proposition.

Goku grinned happily. He knew Bulma would save the day. The only thing would be convincing Vegeta to still stay in the competition with him. That he was seriously worried about. Clearing his through, Goku decided to find out who the mystery teacher was going to be. "That's great Bulma. So, who do you have in mind? Are they nice?" Goku hated scary teachers and the last thing he needed was a drill instructor teaching him how to cook. He shuddered at the thought.

Smiling at Goku, Bulma nodded her head in the affirmative. "Yeah, they're extremely nice, if a little slow at the uptake. In fact, you both know the person I have in mind. She happens to be my mother."

Vegeta's eyes popped at the mention of his mother in law. Jumping out of his chair, he stood up and shook his fist in the air at this crazy mate.

"Your mother!? No way Bulma! I absolutely refuse to put myself in her power. She's a complete and total imbecile, not to mention the fact that I think she's lost her mind _and_ I can't stand her!"

Turning red, Bulma stepped over to where Vegeta was having a royal cow. Putting her finger in the middle of his chest, she pushed him backwards an inch. "Listen up my sweet Prince, if you want to learn how to cook, she's the ticket. You know how talented she is. And it would mean a lot to her if you would actually show some interest in her. She thinks the world of you Vegeta, for whatever bizarre reason, even when you first showed up here and were a complete royal jackass."

"That's because she's sick and has some sort of demented attraction towards me. You can't be serious."

Goku looked at Vegeta, slightly embarrassed that his training partner was having a temper tantrum. He didn't think Mrs. Briefs was all that bad. Besides, she was a terrific hostess and always made sure there was plenty of food for everyone to eat when the Z-squad all got together to hang out and visit. "Come on Vegeta, stop being so stubborn. Bulma's right. We need to learn how to cook, and I think Mrs. Briefs will be a great teacher."

Looking over a Goku, Vegeta crossed his arms and grunted in irritation. "Huh, _you're_ just saying that because you want to stuff your ugly face. Dream on! I'm not training with that nitwit and that is final!"

Trying to sway her headstrong husband, Bulma took another approach. "Look Vegeta, you can still be in charge of your training. But all the strategies that you and Goku come up with will mean nothing if you can't cook, plain and simple. When is this competition anyway?"

"A little less than a month, Woman."

"Okay. You can start training with my mom tomorrow. I'm sure it will only take her a week, two at the most, to get the two of you up to speed because you do have some amount of intelligence between the two of you." Lowering her voice so only Vegeta could here, Bulma put forward the bait that would get Vegeta to go along with her idea. "And if you do this Vegeta, I'll do what ever you want, whenever you want it, in private, for the next two weeks, if you catch my meaning." Seeing the look in his eyes, she could tell that he had definitely caught her meaning. But he wasn't going to let her get by that easily. If he was going to spend any amount of time whatsoever with his demented mother-in-law and Kakarot, she was going to make it worth his effort. Grabbing a hold of her arm, he decided to use their bond to get his point across.

"_Woman, it will be whenever and wherever I want it for the next year if I agree to go along with your stupid plan. That's the only way I'll agree!"_ He watched and waited as Bulma mulled over his counter offer. Smirking satisfactorily when Bulma shook her head yes, he let go of her, rubbing his hands thinking of all the ways he could catch her alone.

"Fine. I'll do it. But Bulma, if you back out of your part of the bargain, the deal is off." Rounding on Kakarot, he stared at the imbecile who was blushing because he had heard Bulma's 'offer.' Rolling his eyes at how modest the idiot was, Vegeta stepped slightly towards him. "The same goes for you Kakarot. If you so much as open your mouth and let slip a hint of what's going on, no matter whom it is, and I find out, you can kiss your life goodbye along with any hope of competing in this little game. Got it?"

"Yeah, I got it Vegeta."

"Fine! You can leave now. I've spent enough time standing in your mind numbing presence. And you better not be late tomorrow Kakarot, or your head is on a plate." With that said, he watched as Goku shrugged his shoulders sheepishly and then grimaced in pain when he touched one of his burned hands to his forehead to teleport out of the kitchen. In less then a second, the idiot was gone, leaving Vegeta alone with his infuriating, yet stimulating mate. Knowing she was going to start in on him about cleaning up the mess he and Goku had made, Vegeta ki blasted all the evidence so he wouldn't be put on kitchen patrol. Looking at Bulma who looked like she wanted to kick him where it counted, he smiled slightly and sauntered up to her before she could say anything. Grabbing a hold of her, he lowered his mouth until they were in a serious liplock. Being mated to her did have its benefits. Releasing her from his embrace, he headed towards the outside door, looking slightly over his shoulder. "I'm going out to train. I have a feeling the Gravity Room is going to need to be repaired in say, about an hour, so you had better make yourself available like you just promised you would." Smirking at her when he saw her embarrassed expression, Vegeta made his way out the door.

Today had not worked out at all like he had planned. But maybe the deal he had struck with Bulma would bear fruit. There was one thing Vegeta liked and that was a good fight, and he wasn't going to compete to get on that stupid cooking show without all of his guns blazing. He was going to come out the winner and all idiot humans would be in awe of his superb Super Saiyan cooking abilities. Well, maybe that was going a bit too far. Still, even if he did have to put up with his mother-in-law, if she could teach him and that idiot third class a thing or two about cooking, they might actually have a fighting chance, and right now that was all that mattered to Vegeta. With that thought, Vegeta unlocked the Gravity Room, hoping Bulma would show up at his appointed time and also hoping he wasn't going to continue regretting ever getting involved with Kakarot's stupid scheme.

_Hehe! How will Vegeta and Goku survive cooking classes with Mrs. Briefs? Will it even help their chances of getting on Iron Chef America? Find out in the next chapter!_

_P.S. I make reference to Vegeta blowing up the kitchen previously from chapter two in my other story **Men Suck!** even though this story really isn't a sequel to the other one. And I upped the rating because of the sexual overtones in this chapter. But don't worry. This story is definitely about V and G competing in a cooking show and I hope you guys still are enjoying it. Please, please, pretty please read and review if you are reading this story, even if you don't like it! I appreciate it._


	5. Family Trials

**Here's the next chapter. I hope you find it amusing. And please review. It helps me to stay motivated writing this story.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own DBZ or Iron Chef**

_**Family Trials**_

A week had passed since Vegeta and Goku had been caught in the act of trying to bake a cake with disastrous results. Sitting inside the Gravity Room with his legs crossed indian style, Vegeta let out a deep breath as he tried to meditate. As of late, it had become his early morning routine besides his regular vigorous training regimen with Trunks. Normally, he only meditated about once a week, but his nerves had become so fried, he was afraid that if he didn't try to relax, he was going to end up nuking West City by accident.

The last week had been a living nightmare for him. In the back of his mind, he wished he could go back in time and blast that baka Kakarot before he had the chance to convince him to try out for that idiotic cooking show. In fact, he was sorely tempted to swipe Bulma's damn Dragon Radar from her top secret hiding place and search for the stupid Dragon Balls himself, making a wish to erase everything that had transpired up to the point where Kakarot had shown up at his house last week. Sure, having Bulma on an almost regular basis was some sort of reward for having to put up with Kakarot every day. That he could deal with. Besides, if the idiot became to annoying, he could always aim a retaliatory ki blast at him or kick him in the head for good measure without worrying that he was doing any serious damage. It was his mother-in-law that was the problem. Even now, he still couldn't believe that he'd gone along with Bulma's stupid plan in exchange for having her anytime he wanted for an entire year. What had he been thinking? It wasn't like she was that hard to convince to hop in the sack with him anyway. But that was just it. He hadn't been thinking, and now he had to pay the price for his stupidity.

Looking up at the digital clock Bulma had installed in the Gravity Room, he realized it was only 6:25 am. He still had a couple more hours before his moronic counterpart showed up to learn the fine art of cooking from his psycho mother-in-law. Thinking back to when he had first met the fruit basket, he should have done away with her from the beginning. Personally, he didn't think she was sane. Besides which, wouldn't he have given the world a blessing by getting rid of one more nutcase? Sighing in frustration, he realized that for all the positives associated with her death, there were just as many negative consequences as well. If he had given into temptation all those years ago, Bulma probably would have permanently kicked him out of her house and he wouldn't have his precious Gravity Room along with an unlimited supply of food to satisfy his Saiyan appetite. It was one thing to ignore the nitwit and avoid her at all costs, but it was quite another to have to deal with her everyday for three or four hours as she instructed both he and Kakarot in cooking techniques. On top of all of that, Vegeta felt like where cooking was concerned, both he had Kakarot really didn't have an ounce of talent between the two of them. It was one thing to learn something you had a predisposition towards, but it was quite another to have to learn something that only led to disappointment day, after day, after day without remorse. He was about ready to pull his hair out, not caring that it would never grow back.

Letting out a deep breath, allowing his energy to flow through his body, he tried to let the annoying and frustrating thoughts leave his system, but it was like there was a continuous pipeline that wouldn't allow for his discouraging thoughts to leave his mind. After a few minutes of concentrated efforts, he finally felt himself begin to relax. So intent was he on his breathing and ki distribution, he became completely oblivious to everything around him except for himself. Unfortunately, his state of deep relaxation was short lived, thanks to the efforts of certain purple haired prankster who thought it was amusing to torment his poor father on a regular basis.

Trunks had been surprised that it was the third day in a row that his overbearing father hadn't dragged him out of his bed to train. The first day, he had been ecstatic. The last couple of training sessions with his dad hadn't gone very well and his father also seemed to be crabbier than normal which wasn't a good thing according to Trunks. But another two days of not being literally forced to train was starting to bother him. Maybe his dad had been telling the truth when he had told him he was a wimp and a baby, not wanting to waste his efforts on a child. Deep down inside, even though he would rather spend his time playing practical jokes with Goten or fooling around with his video games, it bothered Trunks that his dad suddenly didn't want to spend time with him. He had no idea that Vegeta was purposely avoiding him for the simple reason that he was afraid he would blast Trunks to oblivion by accident if he pissed him off too much with one of his immature tricks or whining behavior. Deciding to see what was up with his dad, he had gotten up early and decided to interrupt his training in the most memorable way he could.

Sneaking into the Gravity Room, he was surprised to see his dad just sitting in the middle of the floor with his legs and arms crossed, levitating about a foot off the ground.

'What's he doing?' Trunks thought to himself as he stealthily crept along the opposite wall of the Gravity Room, careful to dampen his ki down to zero so his father wouldn't suspect anything was up. He had to agree with his mom that Vegeta sure had been acting strange lately. Plus Goten had said his dad was behaving just as strangely, disappearing in the mornings before he left for school without a word to anyone. Shaking his head slightly, he crept towards the control panel, smirking evilly about what he was going to do to his unsuspecting father. Carefully maneuvering up to the controls, Trunks found the button that gradually increased the gravity from zero to whatever number his dad desired to train in. Quietly opening up the control panel as he had seen his mother do a million times to fix it when it was broken, he pulled out the screwdriver and wrench he'd stolen from his mother's tool box. Locating the alarm system that was activated anytime the gravity device was turned on, he methodically disarmed it so his dad would have no clue as to what was about to happen. Grinning to himself, he placed the cover back on and then wiped his hands on his pants. Peeking his head over around the edge of the panel, he let out a sigh of relief when he saw his dad was still in the same position and still clueless about Trunks's presence. Sliding back over to where the gravity button was, he cranked up the gravity from zero to 700 G's, sprinting over to the observation deck his mother had installed because it wouldn't be effected by the change in gravity. Opening the door silently, he fled inside before the change in gravity became evident, not wanting to have to give away his presence by increasing his ki output so he wouldn't be squashed into a pancake.

Vegeta was still clueless as to the dangerous prank his offspring had pulled on him. That is, until the gravity kicked in without warning. Feeling tremendous pressure being applied to his body, he found himself being pushed onto the floor. Snapping his eyes opened, he felt himself being flattened out across the floor. It was like the machine had become possessed, suddenly applying gravity with no instructions or no warning. Fearing that the machine was going to keep increasing the gravity until it blew itself apart, Vegeta closed his eyes and concentrated on turning into a Super Saiyan before he found himself as a permanent addition to the floor. In a matter of seconds, he felt his power surge through his system, his body flashing gold as he ascended to his next transformation. Pushing himself upright, he walked over to the console, relieved that the gravity hadn't continued to increase, seeing that the machine was reading an output of 700. Scratching his head in confusion, he turned the machine off, deciding to call Bulma in to check it out even though she would be none to pleased about being dragged out here first thing in the morning. He was about to press the communicator when he caught something out of the corner of his eye. Looking down, he saw that there was a wrench lying in front of the panel that housed the technical parts of the machine. Narrowing his eyes, he realized it hadn't been there when he had first came inside this morning. Putting two and two together, he suddenly had a very good idea of what had just transpired. Or rather, who it was that had orchestrated such a trick.

Putting the wrench behind his back, Vegeta calmly looked around for any signs of his hellion son. Internally, he was filled with seething anger. How dare his offspring pull a stunt like that on him? As soon as he located him, Trunks was going to find out a whole new meaning of the word punishment, and it wasn't going to be pretty. Coming to the conclusion that Trunks had to still be hiding somewhere in the Gravity Room, Vegeta felt a thrill of triumph when he noticed the door to the observation deck was slightly ajar. Walking over to it, he flung the door open, seeing his son try to disappear behind a chair. Stepping inside the room, he directed his enraged gaze over at the cowering boy. Pulling the wrench out from behind him, he held it out in plain sight. "Looking for this, brat?" Vegeta asked casually, a hint of menace flavoring his question.

Trunks gulped. He had seen his dad pissed off before. It was pretty much his only state of emotion, and it didn't help that a lot of his anger was caused by the fact that his only child delighted in making a fool of him on a regular basis. But he had never pulled a dangerous stunt on his dad before, and thinking about turning up the gravity like that, he realized his father could have been killed. On top of that, his father looked like he had reached a whole new level of anger and it was going to be directed at him. He was still in his Super Saiyan form, his golden aura surrounding him and making him seem more intimidating. One of his eyes was twitching and the veins on his forehead were sticking out, the telltale sign that he was angry. It was his tone of voice that had Trunks worried, though. His dad always yelled when he was angry, but so far, he hadn't even raised his voice. Swallowing nervously, he carefully backed his way out of the corner, trying to figure out how he was going to get out of this predicament. Looking up, he addressed his father.

"Uh, no Dad. Why would I be looking for a wrench? I was just, uh, just cleaning up in here. You know, straightening the chairs and stuff." He said as he pushed his hands into his pants pockets and tried to look as though he had no idea about why his father was so upset. Unfortunately, Vegeta was an expert at detecting lies, and since he also had a very good understanding of his son's psyche, the excuse didn't get him very far.

Staring at his son, Vegeta vaporized the wrench in his hands, making Trunks gasp out guiltily. That was his mom's favorite wrench! She was going to kill him when she found out that it no longer existed in its solid form. Vegeta's gaze only hardened when he saw his son's reaction. "Why do I have the distinct impression that you aren't telling me the truth? You should know that I don't take being lied to very favorably. So even though I'm going to thoroughly punish you, it would be better for you in the long term if you are honest with me." With that, he lunged at his son, grabbing him by the scruff of his neck, bodily picking him up and carrying him outside, ignoring his struggles to get free.

"You never learn when enough is enough, do you brat? You always have to see how many buttons you can push before I reach my limit. Well this time, you aren't getting away scott free." Grinning nastily down at his cowering child, Vegeta savored the look of pure terror he got when he told Trunks exactly what he was going to do to him. "Since you seem to have a difficult time listening and obeying me, I think your mother will have a few things to say when she hears what you've been up to and discovers her favorite wrench has been eradicated." Oh yes, he knew very well the wrench Trunks had stolen was from his mate's private store of tools and she wasn't going to be happy that it had been effectively reduced to sub-atomic particles.

"Come on Dad!" Trunks whined, squirming even harder to get away from Vegeta's iron clad grip. "I promise, I'll never do that again. Just don't turn me into Mom! Please!" Shuddering visibly, he didn't want to have his mother find out. She already hated the fact that he wasn't doing so well in school and he also knew she barely tolerated his pranks. This stunt had been a lot more dangerous, even if he had done it for the sake of getting some attention. Knowing his mom, she was going to have an apoplectic attack when she found out, and her punishments were much more severe than his dad's were. The only punishments his dad ever gave him where extra training sessions in the GR, which he could handle even if they sucked royally. But Vegeta wasn't the type of person who could be emotionally swayed and all Trunks's pleas did was harden his resolve. His brat could have killed him and he was not going to tolerate such behavior. He would even back Bulma one hundred percent with whatever punishment she deemed worthy.

"Stop your whining! Save if for your mother." With that, he pushed open the kitchen door with his foot, walking inside and meeting his mate's surprised face as she sat drinking her morning cup of coffee.

"Vegeta! What are you doing coming inside so early?" Narrowing her eyes, she saw he was holding a guilty looking Trunks who looked like he wanted to be a million miles away from where he was at the moment. "And why are you holding Trunks like that? You could hurt him." Setting her coffee down, she waited to see what this interruption was all about, especially curious because Vegeta looked extremely angry and he was in his Super Saiyan form, something he normally never did inside the house.

"Huh, why am I holding him like this? Because he'd get away if he could, that's why." Turning his head towards his son, he gave him an intimidating stare before he released him. Standing off to the side, he crossed his arms and motioned for his son to explain himself before his mother. "The brat has something he'd like to tell you."

Glancing over at his mom, Trunks rubbed his toe against the linoleum before he addressed her. "I, uh, Iturnedthegravityupto700withouttellingdadaboutit." Trunks blurted out as fast as he could."

Shaking her head, Bulma rolled her eyes. She had a feeling Trunks had done something really bad, worse than usual to his dear old dad because Vegeta seldom brought Trunks before her to have her hear the whole story before he punished his child. Besides that, it was painfully obvious to her that Trunks was feeling guilty and he didn't want to get into major trouble, other signs that pointed to him doing something naughtier than usual. "Trunks, I didn't get that. You're going to have say that more slowly."

Sighing, he inwardly groaned. He was so dead. "I said, I turned the gravity up to 700 without telling Dad about it and he went berserk."

Bulma didn't get a chance to reply before Vegeta interrupted, bellowing at his son.

"Tell her the entire truth brat! And don't forget to tell her about her favorite wrench." Seeing that his son was hesitating, Vegeta stepped in even closer and shook his arm at Trunks. "And be quick about it!"

Giving his father a dirty look, Trunks muttered under his breath. Stealing himself for his mother's reaction, he told her everything. "I should say, I snuck in the GR because I wanted to see what Dad was up to. He hasn't been training with me and I was curious. I thought it would be funny to turn up the gravity without Dad knowing about it. So I snuck across the GR, opened the control panel, turned off the alarm, reset the gravity and then hid in the observation deck. Uh, Dad found the wrench I used and then he vaporized it."

It took a moment for Bulma to comprehend what Trunks had just told her. Feeling an immense amount of pride that her son was so intelligent, it was quickly smashed down by her mounting rage at what he could have possibly done to Vegeta by pulling that kind of a stunt.

"Trunks Vegeta Briefs, that is it! What did Vegeta and I ever do in a past life to have such an exasperating child? Do you have any idea what could have happened to your father if he hadn't used his quick thinking to get out of that situation?" She yelled as the stormed over to where Trunks was sulking.

"Come on Mom! Dad trains in 700 G's all the time! I didn't think it would faze him."

"Oh, you didn't think it would faze him did you? Well, child of mine, did it ever occur to you that your dad might not have been prepared for a sudden onslaught of immense gravity? If he wasn't so strong, he could have died! So what do you have to say for yourself? Have you even apologized to him? You're lucky he didn't blast you to the next dimension!" She looked over to where Vegeta was standing resolutely, relieved to observe that he had calmed down somewhat and was no longer a Super Saiyan.

Trunks just shrugged his shoulders and said he was sorry to his angry father. It just wasn't fair that his parents were always ganging up on him. Trying to speak up in his defense about the prank, he decided to give his side of the story. His mom could be terrifying, but he could usually sway her to his side after he explained himself. The only problem was that the trick didn't usually work on his father, and he had a hard time believing his dad would let his mom loosen up his expected punishment. Deciding it was worth a shot, he opened his mouth.

"Like I said, I'm sorry Dad. I didn't really think about the consequences. But Mom, I only did it cause I wanted Papa to pay attention to me. He hasn't drug me out of my bed to train for the last three days and I think he doesn't want me for his kid."

Vegeta growled under his breath. He knew what his conniving offspring was up to. Closing his eyes, he contacted Bulma with his mind.

"_Look Woman, he's only trying to weasel his way out of the punishment he deserves. If you cave in on him like he's hoping, he'll only be that much worse to deal with, and right now between training with baka Kakarot and your crazy mother, there is a very fine line between my sanity and blowing up this entire city, and I don't want to be pushed over the edge. So think carefully on your decision."_

"_Hey Vegeta, don't worry about it. I know you're stressed to the max right now. Besides, this level of prank is completely unacceptable. No matter how much you get on my nerves, I don't want to have to deal with you being dead again."_

With that said, Bulma turned her attention back to her son, who looked like he wanted to be anywhere but there. "Look Trunks, I thought you didn't like training first thing in the morning. I see where you're coming from, but honestly, if Vegeta didn't want you as his son, you would know about it fair and square. Right Vegeta?" Bulma asked her husband, relieved when he nodded his head in the affirmative. "So don't think I'm going to go any easier on you just because you feel you've been slighted. Your dad is under a lot of stress right now even though I'm not at liberty to explain the whole situation." Ignoring Vegeta's outraged expression, she continued on. "But pulling that kind of dangerous prank is completely unacceptable." Hearing Trunks start to implore her, she put her hand up to motion for him to be quiet before she continued on. "Starting today, you are grounded for the next two months. No video games, no television, not MP3 player or computer, unless it's for homework and absolutely no hanging out with Goten or having Goten come over here. On top of that, you are going to help your grandmother with kitchen detail after breakfast and supper. Plus, you are going to scrub down the Gravity Room by hand every day after your father is done training in it, no work bots allowed. And if your father so chooses to use you as a punching bag, you will train with him without complaint. If you shirk up on your chores, mouth off to your father when he wants to train, or I catch you trying to use the items I have just decided to confiscate, your punishment will be extended for the entire summer. And don't think I'm not serious about this, Trunks." Turning around to Vegeta, she sensed his pleasure in the punishment she had meted out for Trunks, realizing that their son was going to be in torment for the next two months. "Vegeta, does this meet with your approval?" She smiled when he grunted and moved his head up and down. Turning back to Trunks, she felt a smidgen of guilt when she saw he was close to tears. But truthfully, having all of his toys confiscated and limiting the amount of time he spent with Goten would be good for him and it would hopefully help him to improve his grades, which were not where they should be. "Does that make sense?" Seeing Trunks's sullen nod, she let out a sigh of relief. "Good. Now run upstairs and get ready for school." With that said, the little purple haired boy ran as fast as his legs could carry him away from his overbearing parents.

Looking over at where Vegeta was standing, Bulma walked up to him. Putting her hand on his arm, she looked into his eyes. "Hey, are you okay? He didn't hurt you did he?"

"Huh, I'm not a weakling Woman." He was about to turn around and go back outside, but Bulma tugged on his arm and brought him over to the table. Seating himself, he waited as she bustled around the kitchen he had become more familiar with in the last week than he had ever wanted to, jealous that she seemed to have such an easy time at preparing food when he still couldn't get the hang of it. Blast it, but his training was not going well at all!

Coming back to the table, Bulma sat a cup of Vegeta's favorite breakfast tea blend out in front of him. Sitting back down behind her cup of coffee, she folded her hands underneath her chin, watching as he took a sip of the warm drink. Deciding to make the first move, she spoke up.

"So, do you want to talk about it?"

"What would I want to talk about? You dealt with him in an acceptable fashion, end of story."

"I'm not talking about Trunks, Vegeta. I'm talking about why you're so tense. I know what you've been doing first thing in the morning and I also can understand why you've chosen to forgo training with our son. Remember, I can sense things about you." She said as she tapped her head.

Snorting contemptuously, Vegeta sat his cup of tea down and looked at his mate. What did she care? It was partially her fault that he was in this predicament! Leaning back in his chair, he crossed his arms, watching her as she observed him. "Well, I don't see how talking about my _feelings _will help my situation one way or the other."

Smiling slightly, Bulma cocked her head. "Well, at least you're admitting that you have them anyway."

"Huh, I never admitted anything. Don't be foolish."

"Cut the crap Vegeta. You know I know you care about others. If you were still the remorseless bastard you were when you showed up on Earth, you would have killed Trunks this morning and I have a feeling that both my mother and Goku would have been dead several times over during this last week. All I'm saying is that maybe if you tell me what's bothering you, we can come up with a solution and you'll feel better, that's all." Looking on, she saw Vegeta roll his eyes sarcastically as he picked up his cup and took another sip.

Vegeta sat there mulling out what Bulma had just said in his mind. Truthfully, he didn't want to admit anything to her because it would just add to his humiliation. But he knew one thing and that was the fact that Bulma knew the innermost workings of his mind and besides that, though he was loathe to admit it to himself, with her intelligence, maybe she could see a way to improve both he and Kakarot's ability to learn how to cook. Needless to say, Bulma was more than a bit shocked when Vegeta actually opened up his mouth.

"Fine Woman. You're mother is a flaming quack and spending so much time with Kakarot is enough to make any self respecting person want to kill themselves. Besides that, you said it would only take Kakarot and myself a week with your crazy mother to learn the fine art of cooking, yet all we've learned is that we have about as much cooking talent as a cockroach."

"Don't say that Vegeta! Honestly, cooking is difficult. You need to have the two P's: precision and patience. I know you can do it. I mean, think back to when you first met me. I could make a mean barbecue, but basically, my cooking skills stunk royally. It wasn't until I had to start helping my mom out with the cooking to feed you that I actually picked it up. Besides which, my mom says she hasn't had this much fun in years!" Which was true. The first day she had spent with her surly son-in-law and his idiotic partner, she had told Bulma she felt like a kid at Christmas time. Even though she had said they had failed at every attempt to create something edible, they both seemed genuinely interested in learning from her, although each had different ways of showing it. Goku just asked lots of questions, while Vegeta was quieter, but much more observant. The only thing she could figure about why they hadn't managed to cook anything that someone would enjoy eating was because they still hadn't figure out how to work as a team. Vegeta was turning out to be as much of a perfectionist about the organization of tasks as Bulma was, whereas Goku tended to be more than a bit absent-minded.

"Fine, so your mother is having bloody wonderful time. But that still doesn't explain why Kakarot and I can't cook. And we don't have much time to learn, with that stupid contest being less than three weeks away." Vegeta growled out as he pushed his empty teacup away from where he was sitting.

"I think you're trying too hard Vegeta. Maybe if you'd loosen up a little and stop thinking of this in terms of winning a dumb contest, things would go better. If you had a little fun with the process, I'd bet you see more results." Seeing Vegeta's eyes narrow at the mention of the dreaded 'f' word, Bulma hurried on before he could get up and walk away. "Okay, so you don't have to be all loose and giddy about it. That's beside the point. Other than that, the only thing my mom has come up with is that you and Goku don't really work very well together as a team. I'm not putting the blame on either one of you, but somehow, you have to figure out how to tolerate Goku enough to get your mission accomplished. I know that you operate pretty much as a loner and that suits your personality, but if you want to win, you're going to have to swallow some of your pride and let Goku help you out, otherwise you can forget kicking some sissy chef's butt." Putting her hands to her sides, Bulma was even more shocked when Vegeta started to move his head slowly up in down in agreement. She almost fell out of her chair when he actually openly voiced his thoughts on the matter.

"Hmm, that does make sense. Looking back, I can see how trying to work independently on something we are supposed to do together could have ended up disastrously. Perhaps I will have to make more of a conscious effort to be more of a team player, so to speak. But that still doesn't excuse the fact that both your mother and Kakarot try my patience to the limit with their incessant blabbering and idiotic laughter." Looking at his mate's shocked expression, he was a little bit embarrassed himself that he had told her so much.

"Wow Vegeta!" was all Bulma managed to get out of her mouth. Standing up grumpily, Vegeta grabbed his teacup and Bulma's empty coffee cup and placed them in the sink. Leaning backwards against it, he watched her as she straightened herself up. "What are you staring at? If that's the only kind of response I'm going to get for opening up to you, than you can forget it ever happening again."

Shaking her head to clear it, Bulma coughed discretely and then stood up, making her way to where Vegeta was leaning up against the sink. Putting her arms around his slim waist, she looked into his eyes. "I know you can do it Vegeta. Maybe today, you'll have your breakthrough and then you can move onto more advanced training. I want to see you and Goku win."" She could feel Vegeta leaning in towards her; ready to give her a morning kiss when they both heard the kitchen door open. Letting go of each other, they casually backed apart, watching as Mrs. Briefs bustled into her domain.

"Oh, good morning Bulma." Seeing Vegeta with her daughter, Mrs. Briefs winked at him, ignoring his sour glower. "Good morning my star pupil! Did you come in early to help me cook breakfast? I would love the help and the cute company." Laughing, she watched as Vegeta looked away from her and ignored her comments. Seeing Bulma's expression, the both of them started to giggle, which only made Vegeta more irritable. Moving away from the sink, he decided it was time to head back out to the Gravity Room before his temper got the better of him and he blasted something. He had another hour to straighten out his frustration before the torture of learning how to cook continued.

"Where are you going Vegeta?" Bulma asked as she watched her mother start to pull eggs and meat out of the refrigerator to begin preparation for breakfast.

Turning around slightly, he answered her. "I'm going out to ease my frustration before she ends up becoming nothing more than a pile of ashes." With that, he left unceremoniously, slamming the kitchen door behind his retreating figure. Throwing her hands up in annoyance, Bulma turned to where her mother was standing, grabbing a frying pan to start cooking the large amount of food that was mostly going to end up in Vegeta's and Trunks's stomachs.

Looking over her shoulder to where her mother was still pulling out ingredients from their industrial sized refrigerator, Bulma started cracking eggs into the pan. "So Mom, what do you honestly think are the chances that both Vegeta and Goku are going to be able to learn how to cook?"

"Oh, I don't know honey. Yesterday, their cake almost turned out. I think Goku forgot to add the sugar though because it tasted terrible. I can sense that they are both very close to getting the hang of it. Poor Vegeta though. I don't know how much more he can take of having to listen to me. He tries so hard and he gets so discouraged every time he fails at it. He reminds me of you, sweetie." With that, Mrs. Briefs got to work whipping up pancakes.

"Hmm, he reminds you of me does he? Well, that's probably why we're so perfect for one another. Anyway, I hope they have a breakthrough today Mom because if they don't, I don't think West City will exist much longer."

"Maybe you're right." Mrs. Briefs said absently as she began to pour the batter onto the griddle she had heated up. Both she and her daughter became lost in their thoughts. Mrs. Briefs thought about how fun it was spending time with the two saviors of the world and Bulma thought about how much she wanted them to kick butt. Both prayed that today would be the day when Goku and Vegeta would finally learn the fine art of culinary skill.

_Okay, sorry there was no Goku. I just wanted you guys to see how Vegeta is dealing with his training. Next chapter will be all about Goku and Vegeta cooking with Mrs. Briefs. Will they finally have their breakthrough? And please review!  
_


	6. Breakthrough?

**Here is the next chapter. I'm sorry it took so long to update, but December was a heck of a month with finals, Christmas, my sister getting married and blah, blah, blah! So here is the first update of the New Year.**

**Thanks to Bulma and Vegeta fan, SuperMysticWarrior, HannibalFrost, Krista79, ssjEasterBunny, and another B/V Lover for your reviews. I really appreciate them.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own DBZ or Iron Chef America**

_**Breakthrough?**_

About an hour after Mrs. Briefs had finished cleaning up the kitchen from breakfast with the help of her darling grandson; mostly everyone had cleared out of the house for the day, off doing their regular daily routine. Mrs. Briefs had gone up to her rooms to freshen up before she had to come back down to the kitchen to recommence with her cooking lessons. So the kitchen was completely empty when Goku used his instant transmission to appear for his daily training with Vegeta.

Looking around, he was somewhat puzzled by the lack of people in the vicinity. True to his word to Vegeta, he had made sure to arrive everyday on time although it was starting to become tricky to keep Chi-Chi off of his tail. But then again, she really hadn't been that bad now that he came to think about it. It was most likely due to the fact that she was used to him taking off and leaving sometimes for weeks at a time to train physically and lately, he had been home every single night for over a month, which was a rarity in her book. Scratching his head, he shook it slightly and then decided to get things ready for whenever Vegeta and Mrs. Briefs decided to turn up for cooking lessons. Internally, he felt that both he and Vegeta were close to finally perfecting their baking skills. At least he hoped they were because he had a very distinct impression if they didn't get something right soon, Vegeta was going to go off like an atom bomb. Quickly putting on an apron, he started pulling out the cookbook and the ingredients that they were going to need to use. He hadn't gotten very far along when he heard the outside door open and felt Vegeta's very familiar ki signature as he made his entrance.

Looking around the kitchen, Vegeta found Kakarot pulling stuff out of the pantry. Without saying a word to his partner, he opened up the refrigerator, walking inside and pulling out the eggs and oil that they were going to need to use, having the damned recipe almost memorized inside of his head. Placing them on the kitchen island, he bent over and retrieved the stand mixer that Mrs. Briefs insisted they use although he thought it would be much more expedient for the two of them to use their super speed instead of a crappy machine. But for once, she was the teacher so he had let it go. Thinking about his earlier conversation with Bulma, he decided to use team work instead of each of them doing things without much of a plan, which allowed for Goku's flightiness get the better of him. It wasn't like they had never worked together before. Thinking about the whole experience with fighting Super Buu and Kid Buu, he realized that if he put his mind to getting something accomplished with Kakarot, good things usually followed. He had just fallen back into his old habit of trying to be better than Kakarot and so far, neither one of them was having any success with their task at hand. Glancing over to where Kakarot was standing somewhat awkwardly, he looked over at the clock noticing that his mother-in-law was five minutes late. Not sure what to do, he backed up and leaned against the counter directly behind him, crossing his arms in the process.

"So Vegeta…where's Mrs. Briefs? She's usually here before either one of us shows up." Goku asked curiously. It wasn't like her to be late, especially since she seemed to be having as much fun cooking as he was.

Looking over at Goku, Vegeta let out an irritated grunt and frowned slightly. "How should I know where that crazy freak is? She was here for breakfast. I make it a point to avoid her." Still, Kakarot was right. So far his mother-in-law had turned out to be as punctual as she was nutty. Grimacing slightly, he decided he had to make a decision about how to proceed. They could sit around and wait like idiots or they could attempt to make their cake without supervision. Remembering the consequences of the first time they had done that, he shuddered slightly. The last thing he wanted to deal with was another burning inferno from the oven. Still, they were going to have to cook alone in front of some panel of judges so perhaps it would be wise of them to start without the ditz that was his wife's mother.

Making up his mind, he moved back over to the island, motioning for Kakarot to join him.

"She is obviously late so as the self-appointed leader in this little venture, I say we start without her."

Goku looked over at Vegeta dubiously. What had gotten into him that he wanted to go ahead without Mrs. Briefs present? Usually, he was the more reluctant of the two of them to get started on baking, regardless if she was around or not. He had a feeling that it had to do with the fact that he was embarrassed about how rotten their first attempt had turned out considering it was due to his disregard of the instructions that had caused the disaster in the first place.

Stepping closer to Vegeta, Goku voiced his opinion. "Are you sure about this? I mean, what if we do something really wrong?"

"Look Kakarot, we've been doing nothing but wrong things with her present so what difference will it make if she isn't around? Besides which, she isn't going to be at the trial coaching us, now is she? On top of that, we are warriors, so we should be able to deal with whatever disaster might befall us. It can't be worse then some of the situations we've dealt with in the past." Feeling somewhat satisfied when Goku nodded his head in agreement, Vegeta decided to continue on. "And today, instead of doing things mish mash like with no coherent plan or…or teamwork, I think we should change our strategy a bit. So Kakarot, we have already assembled everything we need. How would you like to proceed?" Vegeta could already feel his face starting to turn red from being so cooperative as he waited for Goku's response.

Looking at his cooking partner, Goku smiled slightly, but not as goofily as he normally would knowing that Vegeta's cooperation without being bullied into doing it was a major step for the Saiyan, and he didn't want to blow this chance.

"Well, for starters, let's just divide up the tasks and do them in order of the recipe. How does that grab you, oh fearless leader?"

"Fine. And don't mock me unless you want your head to end up in the mixer." Vegeta muttered sourly. With that said, he quickly outlined exactly what he was going to do and exactly what Goku would do before he went over and started to preheat the oven, making sure it was set to exactly the right temperature, not twice as hot as what was required in the recipe, something he'd done erroneously the first time they tried to bake a cake.

Humming slightly to himself, Goku started measuring out his ingredients, making sure to have all of them in front of him, not like yesterday when he had managed to forget the sugar somehow. He waited patiently as Vegeta added his things first and then motioned for Goku to add his into the mix. While Goku was using the mixer as specified, Vegeta took out the round cake pans making sure to grease and flour them as he had seen Mrs. Briefs demonstrate numerous times. With that finished, he watched as Goku took the cake batter and measured it into the pans. As soon as he was finished with that, the oven dinged to let the Saiyan duo know it was ready for them to put their unbaked cake inside. Taking the pans, Goku sat them gently inside and closed the oven door, setting the timer and then crossing his fingers that it would turn out. With that accomplished, they both sat down at the kitchen table.

Looking over at Vegeta who had his eyes closed as though he were trying to take a nap, Goku let out a sigh.

"Hey Vegeta, do you think it'll turn out this time?"

"It had better or I'll blast that stinking oven." Vegeta replied without opening his eyes.

Feeling fidgety, Goku suddenly stood up and decided to clean up the mess he and Vegeta had made which was surprisingly minimal. Rolling up his sleeves, he rinsed off the dishes and stacked them in the dishwasher, thanking the stars that the Briefs's owned a state of the art kitchen, not like the one he had back in his house on Mount Pazou.

Turning around, he noticed Vegeta had opened his eyes again but that he seemed to have a far off look in his gaze. Watching him uncomfortably, Goku wasn't sure how to proceed. Running his hands through his hair nervously, he looked uneasily at the door that led to the rest of the house wondering what could have tied up Mrs. Briefs.

"So, what do you want to do while we wait for the cake to bake, Geta?"

That got Vegeta's attention like nothing else. Standing up quickly, he fazed in front of Goku and punched him in the gut, knocking him onto his butt.

Watching grumpily as Kakarot winced slightly and rubbed his sore abdominal muscles, he grabbed a hold of his orange gi and lifted him to his feet, pushing him back slightly.

"Don't ever call me that ridiculous nickname again. Next time, you'll find yourself with a one way ticket to hell." With that he backed off slightly and glared at his former rival. He was sensitive about his name and he expected everyone, especially a third class joker like Kakarot to respect it and its royal origins.

"Yeah, sure thing Vegeta. I was just trying to bring you back to reality anyway." Who knew that Vegeta would be so sensitive about a little shortcut to his name? But then again, it was Vegeta he was talking about who had almost no sense of humor as far as Goku could make out. "So, we've got like thirty minutes left before the cake finishes. What do you want to do?"

"I heard you the first time you asked idiot." Walking over to the fridge, he pulled it open, walking inside to grab something to drink seeing as he was thirsty and didn't feel like drinking water from the tap. Throwing a can to Goku, he went back over to the table and sat down, opening his drink and slugging a third of it down, noticing in irritation that Goku was still holding his, looking at it like it had sprouted horns or something.

"What's wrong Kakarot? You don't like my hospitality?" Vegeta asked, making sure to flavor his words with a hint of menace over the presumed insult.

Looking at the drink and then at Vegeta sheepishly, Goku cracked his can open and shrugged his shoulders.

"I was just thinking that it's a little early to be drinking beer, that's all." Besides that, he didn't particularly like the stuff, thinking it tasted like what he imagined ox urine to be like. However, the last thing he needed was to make Vegeta angry again, letting his imagination run wild with a scenario of him being bodily slammed through the kitchen wall. Of course, this was all lost on Vegeta, who was relaxing slightly on his chair enjoying the taste of the expensive imported beer he was currently nursing. He had to admit to himself that beer was one of the finer things he had discovered while living on putrid Planet Earth.

Letting out a slightly loud belch, Vegeta smacked his lips before he turned his attention to Goku.

"Kakarot, there's one thing you need to learn in life. It is never too early to start drinking beer." With that, he glanced over at the oven timer, noticing that they still had about twenty minutes to kill before the thing was done. Concentrating slightly, he thought back to the attack strategy they had come up with the first day they had started training. Sure, learning how to bake a cake was great but there was one glaring inadequacy: they needed to be able to create a four course dinner using a secret ingredient in an hour's time and he suddenly felt like they were light years away from ever accomplishing that feat. Trying to not let his mood turn despondent, he stood up and went over to the oven, turning on the light to peer inside. He was pleasantly surprised to see that it looked like it was turning out normally. Besides that, the odor created by their cake was actually tantalizing, making his stomach growl in appreciation. Turning around, he glanced over at Kakarot, who was grimacing slightly as he took a swig of his beer. Rolling his eyes slightly, he walked over to the recipe book remembering that cakes usually had frosting. Feeling slightly excited about trying something new out, he opened the book and looked for an easy recipe that wouldn't require a lot of skill. Finding one he thought might work, besides the fact that it was chocolate, another Earth item he had a fondness for, he motioned Kakarot over. So far, they had never frosted their cakes because they had the unfortunate habit of not turning out and Mrs. Briefs wanted to make sure the taste wouldn't be masked by anything. Seeing as she wasn't there and their cake seemed to look like it was progressing normally, Vegeta opted to go against their instructor, mentally noting that she still wasn't present.

"Here Kakarot, I think we should make frosting for our cake. What do you think?" He asked matter of factly, trying to hide the fact that he disliked asking anyone anything.

Looking slightly shocked that Vegeta was asking him for his thoughts on the matter, Goku quickly hid his surprise behind a cheesy smile. "Hey, I think that's a great idea. Did you find one that might work?" He asked as he made his way around the island to where Vegeta was standing.

Tossing the book over to Goku, he watched as the younger Saiyan read through it quickly, shaking his head in agreement.

"This one looks great! And chocolate, you couldn't have picked a better flavor Vegeta. Are you sure you don't have a secret natural skill at cooking that you've been hiding from me?" Goku asked teasingly, almost laughing when Vegeta blushed unmistakably. The one thing he had discovered in the last week or so besides the fact that Vegeta's temper had seemed to become shorter than normal was the fact that it was extremely easy to embarrass and tease his stuffy friend, making their lessons even more fun, even if they had ended up being disastrous.

"Whatever Kakarot! Just get your oversized butt over here so we can plan our attack."

"Sure thing Vegeta!" With that, he tossed the book back over to Vegeta who was still red in the face and was very obviously trying to ignore Goku's overly jubilant mood. Looking at the recipe, they both grabbed the necessary ingredients which thankfully only called for butter, cocoa, milk, vanilla and powdered sugar. Vegeta decided to sift the powdered sugar because he was almost positive Goku hadn't been paying one hundred percent attention during their first lesson when Mrs. Briefs had gone over kitchen equipment and terminology. While he was in the process of doing that, he had Goku warm the milk up in the microwave. Things seemed to be proceeding amazingly smooth today for some reason and Vegeta was grateful. Tossing the butter and cocoa into the mixer, he watched it apprehensively as it mixed together into a nice consistency. Grabbing the sifted powdered sugar, he almost dumped the whole thing in at once, stopping suddenly when he realized he was supposed to put in slowly. Wiping the sweat off of his brow, he was glad he caught himself otherwise he had a feeling that both he and Kakarot would have ended up covered in white powder, along with half of the kitchen. Slowly adding it to the mix, he started to feel nervous when he noticed that Kakarot was watching him closely.

"What are you staring at baka? Don't you have something better you could be doing?" he asked his cooking partner irritably.

Goku crossed his arms before he answered his surly prince.

"No, not really. Anyway, I'm just impressed, that's all. You really seem to have this thing down pat Vegeta. I'm just trying to figure out why we've had such a disastrous time cooking up until this point. Maybe it was me." He did realize that he had spent an inordinate amount of time talking with Mrs. Briefs, letting himself get distracted instead of keeping his eye on the prize, the worst thing a warrior could do. Vegeta, on the other hand, seemed to take precision to the extreme, except for their very first attempt at cooking when he had let his pride and arrogance get the better of him.

Slowly dumping in the rest of the powdered sugar into the mix, he glanced over to where Kakarot was still standing looking slightly dejected. Not really understanding why, he felt like he should say something to let the younger Saiyan know that their disastrous luck so far wasn't completely his fault. Clearing his throat, he thought back to what Bulma had told him earlier that morning.

"Kakarot, it's the two P's: Precision and patience. We just haven't been very precise in our measurements and we haven't worked well together as…as a team. Perhaps today we are working better together and that's why we are having better luck. Anyway, stop acting like a baby and bring over that warm milk before it gets cold and our frosting joins the growing pile of rejects that we have turned out in the last week."

Mock saluting Vegeta, Goku walked over to the microwave, carefully removing the bowl and handing it over to is friend as though it were a surgical instrument and Vegeta was the doctor. This only seemed to irritate the smaller Saiyan as he called Goku a nasty name in a language Goku didn't understand. Watching as their frosting changed from being a lumpy mass to a creamy mixture, Vegeta added the vanilla and then stopped the beaters when it looked like it was the right consistency, even though he wasn't one hundred percent sure.

"Hey, that look's great Vegeta!" Slightly shoving Vegeta out of the way, Goku pulled the bowl off the stand mixer and then immediately stuck his finger into the chocolate frosting. He was about to lick it off of his finger when he felt a hard smack on the back of his head. Turning to the side, he looked sheepishly over at an incensed Vegeta who was giving him a death stare.

"What the hell is your problem? You don't stick your filthy finger into whatever you happen to be cooking. What about personal hygiene?" Honestly, the last thing he needed was to get contaminated with Kakarot germs. Yuck! However, he was curious to see how it tasted and Kakarot always made an amusing guinea pig. Letting out a huff, he used his head to point at the smoking gun that was Kakarot's finger. "Are you going to stand there like moron or are you going to taste it seeing as you couldn't wait to get your filthy fingers in on the action?"

Gulping nervously, Goku licked his finger off, closing his eyes in pleasure as the sweet concoction slid across his tongue, savoring the chocolaty flavor and creamy texture. Of course, his almost orgasmic reaction completely revolted Vegeta who decided then and there that Goku had serious issues at home if tasting chocolate frosting gave him that kind of a reaction.

"Kakarot, get a hold of yourself! You are standing in front of your Prince, for the love of God!"

"Uh, sorry Vegeta. But it's really good! You should try it." Honestly, he didn't even think Chi-Chi had made a frosting this good before. Unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately depending on how you look at it), he didn't realize that Chi-Chi usually cheated and used store bought frosting from a can whenever she made a cake since it saved on time, something that was a precious commodity when it came to feeding her husband and two sons.

Thankfully, Vegeta was excused from having to answer Goku because right at that moment, the oven timer went off indicating that their cake was finished. Walking over to a drawer, he pulled out some hot pads and a toothpick. Handing the toothpick and a hot pad over to Goku, Vegeta opened the oven and pulled the oven rack out slightly, waiting for Goku to test the cakes to make sure they were done in the middle. When Goku gave him a thumbs up, he pulled one pan out and set it on top of the stove, waiting for Goku to pull out the second layer. When that was accomplished, he shut the oven door and turned the oven off.

"Well, Vegeta, do you think they turned out?" Goku asked nervously, rubbing his hands together slightly.

"How should I know? They look normal enough but the cake from yesterday looked fine until we had to eat it and it became obvious that someone had forgotten to add the sugar." Aiming a derisive look over to his sheepish compatriot, they both went back to sitting down, waiting to let the cakes cool slightly before they inverted them and removed the pans. When the time came for that, Goku got up and took a knife like he had seen Mrs. Briefs do, running it along the outside edge of the cake. Carefully flipping them over onto the cooling rack, he was relieved when they fell out without a hitch.

"Hey Vegeta, so far so good. But now we have to wait for the dumb things to cool before we can frost." Suddenly, he was inspired with a really great time saving idea. Turning around to where Vegeta was sitting impatiently fidgeting his legs, he smiled.

"Kakarot, your expression is starting to scare me." Vegeta muttered matter of factly. He looked like that creepy Cheshire cat in that movie his brat used to like to watch when he was younger.

"I just had this really great idea! I could gather the air around me with my ki and push it at the cakes, creating a blast of cool air. What do you think?"

Sitting up in his chair slightly, Vegeta was intrigued. He had been thinking of using their ki abilities to help with cooking, seeing as they might be able to help them cook much faster than conventional methods. But such a controlled use of ki for something other than fighting would take an inordinate amount of practice to perfect. Still, using ki to create a breeze didn't seem all that complicated.

"It sounds like a plausible idea. Just don't blow a hole through my kitchen or you're going to regret it." Shaking his head in understanding, Goku turned back around. Vegeta watched in tense anticipation as he cupped his hands and started to concentrate his ki, similar to how they used their ki to fly but in reverse. Holding his breath, he watched as Goku pushed the air contained with his ki forward, letting it out when all it did was blow over their precious creation with a whoosh before dissipating. Standing up, he walked over to where the bigger man was standing.

"Well, did it work?" Vegeta asked impatiently, wanting to find out for sure. Walking over to the sink, Goku remembered to wash his hands before he touched their end product. Letting out a little hoot of excitement, he shook his head enthusiastically.

"Yeah, I'll say it worked! They're still a little warm, but I think it will be okay to frost them." With that said, he turned around and grabbed the frosting, taking the spatula Vegeta thrust at him. In a manner of seconds the cake was frosted, albeit very sloppily. Noting that they would definitely need to work on presentation, both Saiyans stepped back to admire their handy work. Neither one of them wanted to ruin the moment by cutting into it and eating a piece in case it hadn't turned out after all. Deciding to brave the moment, Goku grabbed a knife and cut a small piece for himself. Inhaling the piece in one mouthful, he gulped it down.

Becoming irritated with Goku's theatrics, Vegeta crossed his arms and glowered at his counterpart.

"How does it taste? I don't have all day to sit and stare at your geeky looking face while you decide if it's any good or not."

"Well Vegeta…It tastes great! We finally did it, even though it took us over a week!" Letting out a whoop, he enveloped Vegeta in a great big bear hug, letting go when he felt Vegeta squirming against him in agitation. Releasing him, he was rewarded for his antics by getting a kick aimed square at his crotch. Holding himself, he fell to the ground with a groan.

Smirking in satisfaction, Vegeta would have laughed aloud if it weren't for the fact that he was still getting over the creepy feeling of Kakarot touching his body. It was bad enough that he'd actually had to share bodies with the idiot but being touched in such a manner was…disgraceful. Ignoring the groans the younger man was making, he cut himself a slice deciding to judge for himself if their cake truly made the grade. Taking a small bite, he savored the flavors of the yellow cake mixed in with the chocolate frosting. It actually was…good. In less then a second, he devoured the rest of the piece.

"Good, huh?" Goku asked, pain lacing his words. Vegeta nodded in acquiescence and then lent his hand to help his partner up to his feet. Pulling Goku upright, he was about to ream him out for acting in the manner of a baboon when the door to kitchen opened up admitting none other than Mrs. Briefs. Growling in irritation, Vegeta gave her a killer look before talking to her.

"Female, you are over an hour late for our supposed cooking lesson. While you were gone, Kakarot and I managed to make our cake which just so happens to have turned out."

Smiling happily, she was elated. Walking over to their slightly lopsided layer cake, she was equally impressed that they had also made frosting besides the cake. Cutting herself a small piece, she ate it and was excited by how wonderful it tasted. She was also happy that her plan had worked out. Deciding that she was just a distraction and that it would be good for the two of them to work together alone, she had purposely shown up late, hoping they would take the initiative in her absence. Thankfully they had, otherwise it would have been a wasted hour and she had a feeling that Vegeta would have decided to quit their little venture.

"Oh boys, I'm so proud of you! This is marvelous! But this is only the beginning. You young men have to figure out how to cook a meal without the use of recipes on top of using an ingredient that you won't have any knowledge of prior to the contest. We've got less than three weeks to get you into shape, but I have a plan that just might work."

Glancing over to where his simpering in-law was standing, Vegeta felt himself grow intrigued. If she could come up with a solution to the same problem he had thought of earlier, he had a feeling it would be a good one. For all that he truly thought she was mentally unbalanced, he could admit that when it came to cooking, she was a certifiable genius just as her daughter was at making mechanical devices.

Moving in closer to the small woman, both Saiyans sat down as she started to divulge her plan, a plan that would hopefully turn the budding cooks into chefs extraordinaire in an extremely short period of time.

_Hmm, what is Mrs. Briefs plan? Will it give our two budding chefs an edge in the upcoming competition? Next chapter: the first trial competition! How will Goku and Vegeta fare? Find out next time. And please read and review! Please!  
_


	7. The First Round of Competition

**Well, it's been about four months since my last update. I apologize. I hope this chapter will make up for the lateness of this update. And thanks to Bulma and Vegeta Fan, pitkat, SuperMysticWarrior, Twin Tails Speed, DBZ maineak and Krillin Fan for reviewing. Also, I apologize if reading this is a repeat for some. I had uploaded it earlier this week, but I accidentally deleted it. Then, when I tried to upload it, I had issues for the last four days with the server. Sorry!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or Iron Chef America. **

_** The First Round of Competition**_

Vegeta stood in front of his bathroom mirror, looking at his reflection anxiously. Although the last month had been a living, breathing hell, the day of reckoning had finally arrived. Today would be the day that would tell if his and Kakarot's cooking lessons had paid off. And if the day ended in defeat, he was never going to fall for one of Kakarot's lame brained ideas again. He was a Saiyan Prince, and it was almost embarrassing how often he fell for his third class rival's strange ideas.

Clenching his teeth tightly, he tried to relax. He was not going to look like a fool. Both he and Kakarot had worked too hard to have the day end in complete humiliation. They had improved substantially, both in teamwork and the ability to cook recipes from memory. They had an arsenal of meal plans that could work with almost any ingredient, the brilliant yet simple idea courtesy of his strange mother-in-law. And above all, they could actually create food that tasted good. Their presentation skills needed work and they still hadn't mastered the one-hour time limit, but they were still within the realm of being able to compete against one of the Iron Chefs. He just had to believe in both his and Kakarot's abilities. He had to because if he didn't, that would be their downfall.

"Vegeta, are you going to come out of there or do I have to drag you out? I have to use the bathroom too! If you don't hurry up, I'm going to end up peeing in my pants."

Rolling his eyes, Vegeta snapped out of his reverie. Opening the bathroom door, he almost fell over as Bulma raced past him, pushing him to the side.

"Oh God, Oh God!"

Making a disgusted face at his strange mate, Vegeta watched with humor as she danced around in front of the toilet, trying to unzip and pull down her pants. It took all of his self-restraint not to start laughing at how ridiculous she looked. Shaking his head, he turned back to the sink and the mirror above it. Pulling out his shaving cream, he put a small amount in his hand and then started to apply it to his face. Trying to ignore the sounds of satisfaction coming from Bulma as she finally relieved herself, he started his morning shaving ritual.

"Oi, Vegeta. What the heck are you still doing in the bathroom? I'm taking a piss for God's sake. A little privacy would be appreciated. Ugh!"

Angling his face towards his prostrate mate, Vegeta smirked at her outraged expression.

"It's not like I haven't seen you naked before Woman. So why be so embarrassed? You females are so…so strange with your thoughts of propriety. Besides, if you had to relieve yourself that badly, there are plenty of other restrooms throughout Capsule Corporation. You didn't have to use this one."

He turned back to his shaving, hearing her defeated sigh. His arguments had made perfect sense and besides, what was the point of acting outraged over his seeing her in such a vulnerable position? They were, for all intents and purposes, married in the human sense and had been for a long time.

Hearing the sound of the toilet flushing, he moved to the side to allow Bulma room to wash her hands. Rinsing his razor in the running water she was using, he concentrated on getting rid of his five o'clock shadow without cutting himself. Shaving was such a pain in the ass, but it was either that or look like some scruffy vagabond. He did have to keep up appearances. He was a Prince after all.

"So Vegeta, do you think you and Goku are ready for your big day today?"

Glancing over at where Bulma was standing in the bathroom door, Vegeta let out a short sigh.

"We're as ready as we will ever be for the short amount of time given to us to prepare for this battle."

"You don't sound very sure of yourself. That's not like the Vegeta I know."

Growling slightly, Vegeta sat his razor down and then splashed water across his face to remove any excess shaving cream.

"What do you know about it Woman? I've never…I've never participated in such a contest before. How should I know if we are ready or not? I think we stand a chance, but I have no idea how skilled our competition will be. Considering that neither Kakarot or myself had ever made use of a kitchen before we started training for this competition, that could be very bad for us."

Leaning up against the sink with his arms folded, Vegeta waited as Bulma moved in towards him and put her arms around his waist. Looking into his dark eyes, she kissed him and then let go. Taking the hand towel from the bar it was hanging on, she playfully slapped him in the thigh before winking at him provocatively.

"You'll do great today, I know you will! You've worked too hard and been frustrated too many times in the last month not to. Besides, if looks are put into account, you'll win against your competition hands down. I bet there won't be too many other competing chefs that have a six pack and a cute butt!"

Blushing in embarrassment from her frank assessment of his assets, Vegeta felt a small stirring of pride that she was so sure of his and Kakarot's success today. Filing the feeling away in the back of his brain, he put his toiletries away and then moved to finally leave the bathroom.

Leaving the room with Bulma at his heels, he made his way to the closet he shared with her. Ignoring the mess emanating from her side, deciding it wasn't worth starting an argument over, he grabbed his issue blue spandex, white boots and white gloves.

"Vegeta, you aren't seriously considering wearing that today, are you? You're going to look like some kind of freak. Nobody, I repeat nobody, wears spandex. You're the only one I know who loves the stuff."

Letting out a gruff sigh, Vegeta went over to the bed they shared and started pulling on his bodysuit. What was wrong with liking to wear the stuff? It showed off his impressive muscles and it didn't get caught on anything because there was no excess material. It was also easy to maneuver in and he'd been wearing it for the majority of his life. Besides, knowing Kakarot, the idiot was going to show up wearing his trademark orange gi. Why change appearances for a stupid contest?

"Vegeta! No one is going to take you seriously wearing an outfit that makes you look like you just came from a body building competition! Here, wear this instead."

Glancing up from pulling his boots on, he looked at what Bulma was holding in her hands as she looked at him in exasperation.

"Woman, I'm not wearing that. Those silly button down shirts and slacks are fine for when we go out, but I refuse to dress like some pansy-ass. This is a battle, therefore, I'm going to wear what I wear when I fight tough opponents."

Rolling her eyes, Bulma tossed the clothes she was holding onto the bed and then sat down next to him.

"You are the most pig-headed person I know. People are going to look at you funny, I hope you know. And you can't blast them just because they don't respect you the way you think they should. Just remember that Vegeta before you try to punch somebody's lights out when they make some off color comment about your strange outfit."

"I realize that Bulma. I do know how to control my temper around weaklings."

Pulling on his gloves, Vegeta ignored Bulma's snort of disbelief over his statement. Standing up, he started heading towards the downstairs. Both he and Kakarot needed to be downtown at the studios where they were going to be holding the competition trials within an hour to register. Then, for all he knew, it would be a game of waiting before they would have the chance to test their newfound cooking knowledge.

Stepping off the landing, he adjusted his gloves and then made his way to the Gravity Room. Mental preparation before a battle was as important as physical training, and currently, he needed to calm his mind down or else he wouldn't be able to function at the competition.

Punching in his security code, he entered his private sanctuary and then closed the door behind him. Turning on the lights, he was pleased to see that the floors had been properly cleaned and the whole room had been dusted, courtesy of Trunks and his punishment. Vegeta was going to be sorry when the next month ended because that was when Trunks' punishment would be over. It was nice to be able to supervise his belligerent offspring as he performed menial tasks, and besides that, Trunks had been on his very best behavior. Knowing his son, as soon as his punishment was up, he'd be back to doing the same old tricks.

Shaking his head slightly, Vegeta settled himself on the floor, crossing his legs and arms as he concentrated on channeling his mental anxiety into his meditation. Focusing his mind on an image of a blank wall, he listened to his heartbeat and regulated his breathing, taking in deep, strong breaths. In seconds, he could sense his anxiety melting away, feeling foolish that he was nervous to begin with. It was nice just sitting in there; not being interrupted by the constant barrage of noise and activity that the main household continually had going on.

A few minutes passed before Vegeta suddenly sensed the presence of another person within a few meters of where he was sitting. Cracking open one eyelid, he glanced over in front of him and saw none other than Kakarot, who was sporting a stupid grin and scratching the back of his head.

"Kakarot, do you have lice or some other ungodly disease?"

"Uh, no Vegeta. Why do you ask?"

"Because every time I see you, you're scratching your head like some stupid animal infected with a skin parasite."

"A parasite?"

Seeing the perplexed look on his partner's face, Vegeta rolled his eyes and then quickly stood up from his seated position.

"Forget it. When did you get here? And why didn't you have the courtesy to knock before teleporting yourself in here? What if had been doing something…something private?"

"Well, I got here a few minutes ago. Bulma told me you were out here meditating, so I just used my instant transmission and here I am. Besides, I knew you weren't doing anything private in here Vegeta. Bulma was in the kitchen making breakfast for Trunks."

With that, Goku gave Vegeta a knowing smirk, of which Vegeta chose to ignore. He wasn't going to lower himself by becoming embarrassed over what he did in private with his mate in front of the baka.

"Kakarot, get your mind out of the gutter. Now, we still have some time to go over our strategy before we have to show up to the trial competition site. I suggest we make the most out of this opportunity because I guarantee, we won't have the ability to freely converse about our battle plans in front of our competition."

Seeing Kakarot shake his head in agreement, Vegeta started to circle around his partner, one arm folded across his chest and his other hand tapping his chin thoughtfully.

"All right Kakarot. Are you absolutely certain of all the recipes that we are supposed to have memorized?"

"Yeah Vegeta. I've been studying them real close. Don't worry about me, I'm not going to forget a thing."

Raising an eyebrow at his partner, Vegeta let out a dubious chuckle before continuing on.

"And you know your duties as a sous-chef?"

"Yeah Vegeta. You can count on me."

"And you have backup plan number two at your disposal?"

"Hey Vegeta, about backup plan number two, I'm not so sure…"

Stopping in front of Goku, Vegeta clenched his teeth together and then grabbed his orange gi in one of his fists, bringing the bigger Saiyan in so that they were almost face to face.

"You're not sure about what? It's a backup plan, which means if everything else fails, we use it." Letting go of Goku, Vegeta watched as the younger man backed up slowly, eyeing him nervously in the process.

Putting his hands up in front of him, Goku let out a weak chuckle.

"H-hey, I'm sure we won't have to use it. I just don't feel comfortable about it, that's all. But if worse comes to worse, I'll go along with it, even if I don't really like the idea."

"Good. At least we are now in agreement. Remember Kakarot back to when I decided to help you out in this little venture that I'm the one in charge."

With all of that settled, Vegeta decided it was probably best for them to leave the Gravity Room and go back to the rest of the house where everybody else was going through their usual morning rituals.

Walking inside, Vegeta ignored Goku's presence behind him as he sensed out his mate and his loony mother-in-law, who were luckily in the same location. Heading down the hallway towards the living room, he walked through the doorway and spotted the two of them sitting on the couch watching some retarded early morning talk show.

"Ugh, don't the two of you have something better you could be doing besides watching this trash on television? Who cares what the latest fashions are or who's sleeping with whom? It's disgusting how you debase yourself by feeding into what the media is giving out."

Crossing his arms, he let out a huff as the two strange females in his family just looked at one another and laughed.

"Oh Vegeta, you really don't know what your missing out on. But you're so stuffy, it would take a marathon of talk shows to get you to see the value of watching them." Bulma replied to her rather cross husband.

"I will never see the value of watching them foolish Woman. They eat away at what limited brain powers you possess. Just look at Kakarot if you want an example."

Goku, for once, did not miss Vegeta's meaning and gave the older Saiyan a dirty look.

"Come on Vegeta. I don't watch that stuff. I'm out doing work around the house for Chi-Chi or training." With that said, he pushed his way around Vegeta and flopped down on the couch next to Bulma, who was looking at his orange and blue outfit dubiously.

"Gee Goku, you're wearing _that_ to compete in? You're as bad as Vegeta! Nobody is going to take the two of you seriously dressed like martial arts fighters."

"Well, the judges aren't going to care what we are wearing, are they Vegeta? And besides, this is what I always wear when I fight powerful opponents. And I bet Vegeta feels the same way. I just would feel strange wearing anything else."

Feeling validated about his early argument with Bulma over the same topic, Vegeta shook his head in accord. For once, he appreciated Kakarot's agreement, getting him off the hook from more nagging from his overly talkative and loudmouthed mate.

"Well, I don't care what they wear Bulma-chan. They're both so handsome and strong, they could wear a paper bag and make it look good."

Vegeta almost gagged from the frank assessment his mother-in-law directed towards both himself and Kakarot. She hadn't been quite so obvious with her lust for him since she started training the two of them, but apparently, she'd been doing her best to hide her sick perversion. No doubt it was because she had figured out that he wouldn't have tolerated training with her had she acted like a silly chit with an obsessive crush. Deciding that this conversation was foolish in the extreme as well as embarrassing, Vegeta decided to change course.

"Enough of this inane babble! Kakarot and I are wearing our regular fighting uniforms for this competition. End of discussion. And speaking of competition, shouldn't we be leaving Kakarot?"

"Oh yeah Vegeta. I almost forgot about the time! We'll be a little early, but it's better to be early then late." Smiling, Goku stood up and then felt himself being physically yanked around the sofa by a very impatient Vegeta.

"Blah, blah, blah! Just shut up idiot and use your instant transmission to take us there!"

He was about to pull Goku into the hallway when Bulma rounded on the two of them, blocking their only exit out of the room.

"Hey Vegeta, hold on a second! You still have plenty of time before you have to leave and besides, it's just plain rude to leave like that without saying good-bye to me or thanks to my mom for taking the time to train you and Goku on how to cook."

Letting go of Goku's arm, Vegeta frowned at his mate and her mother, who had come up behind Bulma and was waiting expectantly for something.

"Fine. Good-bye Woman. And you nutcase, your…assistance was tolerable."

"Ugh Vegeta! You are so rude sometimes." Turning around to her mother, she saw the look of amusement across her features.

"Mom, you aren't going to let him treat you like that are you?"

"Oh Bulma, it's just Vegeta's way of showing me he had a good time. Isn't that right Vegeta?"

Glancing heavenward, Vegeta shook his head quickly, hoping both Bulma and her crazy mother would miss his agreement. It was humiliating to have to humble himself in front of two of the weakest people he had ever met. But he did suppose he owed some sort of thanks to the two of them because without their brainpower and help, both he and Kakarot would have been up the creek without a paddle.

Smiling happily at Vegeta's rather pathetic show of appreciation, Mrs. Briefs pulled out two small packages. Handing one to Vegeta and one to Goku, she waited as the two stared at her in confusion.

"What is this for?" Both Vegeta and Goku asked congruently.

"Well open it. It's not some sort of trap you two." Bulma added in exasperation, watching as the two Saiyans stared at her mother's offering blankly.

Slowly, both Vegeta and Goku opened their packages. Pulling the lids off the boxes, they each pulled out matching white coats that chefs wear when they are cooking. Vegeta's was embroidered with his name and Goku's had his on it as well.

Blushing slightly, the duo didn't really know what to say. They weren't expecting any sort of present from Mrs. Briefs and, well, such a thoughtful gift from her almost seemed impossible to behold.

"They're jackets the two of you can wear when you compete. That way, you won't have to wear an apron and you'll look professional. I had so much fun working with you two, I'm sad to see it end so…so I hope you like them."

"Awww, they're great Mrs. B! Aren't they Vegeta?" Goku shouted out happily as he put his on over his orange gi. Opening his arms, he enveloped Mrs. Briefs in a big hug and then backed off a bit when he looked over and saw that Vegeta was about to cuff him in the head.

"They're adequate. Now stop goofing around and let's get out of here."

"Right Vegeta." Turning around back to his partner, Goku touched him on the shoulder and put his index and middle fingers to his forehead. Getting a lock on the competition building, he smiled and waved at both Bulma and Mrs. Briefs before the two of them winked out of existence.

Letting out a sigh of relief that both of them were off without a hitch, Bulma went back and sat on the couch.

"Well Mom, I hope they do okay otherwise I don't think we'll ever hear the end of it from Vegeta."

"I think they'll do wonderful. Have a little faith in them dear, and everything will work out fine."

_Meanwhile…_

Goku and Vegeta appeared out of thin air at the competition site. Thankfully, for once, Goku's landing location happened to be an empty room. Otherwise, Vegeta and he would have had to deal with startled and confused onlookers who would have made the day that much more unbearable.

Leaving the empty room, the two Saiyans found their way to the registration desk and were surprised to see that there was no line. Coming up to the woman behind the desk, Vegeta spoke up his concerns.

"Female, why are their no other people in line for this competition? We haven't missed the registration deadline have we?"

Cracking her knuckles in disgust over the short, muscular male's blatant disrespect by calling her 'female,' the receptionist shook her head no.

Seeing that Vegeta's approach wasn't going to get them very far, Goku decided to take over.

"Thanks miss. Um, if you wouldn't mind telling us, what do we need to do to register?"

"Well, are you two sure you're here for the right competition? This is a cooking contest, not some sort of karate or judo exhibition."

"Um yeah, we're here for the _Iron Chef_ competition. We would like to sign up for it, if that's possible."

Looking at the two weirdoes standing in front of her, the receptionist shook her long hair, snapped the gum she was chewing and then handed the two of them the proper forms they needed to fill out.

"Just fill these out and sign and date the bottom. Then when you're through, the competition is being held through those two doors."

In a few minutes, both Goku and Vegeta were finished with their paperwork. Handing it over to the girl, she wished them both good luck as they headed to the door. Judging by their appearance, they were going to need all the help they could get.

Walking towards the doorway, neither Vegeta nor Goku knew if they should be elated by the lack of competition or nervous over the fact that they were finally going to be testing out their newfound abilities. However, upon opening the door, their thoughts of having no competition where completely blown out the window.

There were literally hundreds of people packed into the small room, each one waiting for the chance to prove that they could be on _Iron Chef America_. Swallowing nervously, Both Saiyans found a seat and then stared at the overabundance of people.

"Wh-who knew we would have this much competition Vegeta?" Goku asked nervously.

Nodding his head in agreement, Vegeta licked his suddenly dry lips. He had a feeling that this was going to be a very long day. Not only was he going to have to beat out all of these people with skills he still was unsure of, he was going to have to spend an entire day in close contact with strangers. And he hated being enclosed in large groups of people.

Glancing over at Kakarot, Vegeta nudged his knee to get his attention. Leaning over, he whispered into the baka's ear.

"Kakarot, I think this would be a good opportunity to use our second backup plan."

Shaking his head in up and down, Goku voiced his opinion.

"Y-yeah Vegeta. I think you might be right."

_Well, sorry for the long delay again. I've been trying to finish my other stories and I'm a graduate student, so this just ended up being put on the back burner for a while. Also, if you guys would like to help me out, can you think of what a good secret ingredient would be for the real competition, if Goku and Vegeta make it to the finals? And any recipe ideas would be helpful too!_

_Okay, I really don't get it. Is this story really so bad that nobody is reading it or leaving reviews, except for the above mentioned people? If the interest in this story continues to flag, then I'll probably stop writing it altogether, at least until I finish writing my other stories. Let me know if it's worth it to you for me to keep with it._ _Thanks!_


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